Hi Kathie,
I'm very sorry to read of your loss. My husband passed away in December 2017 and it still hits me like a brick wall at times. I know for me the first year I was in an endless fog. I did manage to take part in a grief group where we went through a book called '8 Critical Questions'. If you are able to, I would recommend looking into getting this book. The author's name escapes me at this time.
One thing I learned from attending the group was that it confirmed that I wasn't going crazy because I was forgetting things and breaking down at any time. What I keep in mind when I start having a down period is that my husband would not have wanted to leave a legacy of depression and tears behind. There will come a time when you can smile at all of the wonderful memories you made together.
Just remember to give yourself permission to grieve. It is not your problem if someone cannot handle you crying when you need to, it is theirs. Everyone's grief is different and someone who has not lost a partner really cannot understand what it is like. Don't let anyone tell you how you should grieve because it is YOUR grief.
I wish you all the best on your grief journey, and remember to lean on the people around you when you need support.