I’m new here

[jillian_9987]

Hi my name is Jillian and I lost my boyfriend a little over year and a half ago. His name was Nathaniel, and we were together for nine years.  He was 30 years old when he passed of cancer and I feel like my entire adult life was with him. I just don’t know what to do now. We have a son that is now six years old, and without him I just don’t think that I could’ve made it. Every day I still struggle.I have a really hard time thinking about certain things and I push them out. I know it’s not healthy, but I’m scared to go over the events of his death by myself. I just need somebody to talk to; somebody that preferably gets it and understands. I’ve looked up quotes,and I listen to music all the time. They help, but it’s not the same. I’ve  sort of secluded myself. I do have family, but I don’t really lean on them for emotional help because they don’t get it. So here I am.

[Caspercat]

Hi Jillian,
My husband passed away just over a year ago from cancer so I can empathize with you.  People try to be supportive, but unless a person has gone through losing a life partner they cannot possibly understand.  I found a spousal loss support group with a hospice in my city and they also have drop in sessions available when needed.  I would strongly recommend looking into such groups in your area.  If nothing else, talking to other people who have lost a spouse has reassured me that I am not going crazy.  There were various ages in the support groups, both men and women.  It really does help to talk about your partner and your life together.  When I am having a really rough day I remember all the good times we had together and I know that Claude would not want to have left a legacy of tears and heartache behind for me. 
I wish you much strength on your on-going journey.
Cher