Dear Scott!
Iīve been trying to get my feelings out everytime I write a poem to my beloved Jan dedicated from the bottom of my heart for keeping the memories of my beloved one alive forever.I get through life,although overwhelmed with sadness,but according to my strong values to cope with my pain on my own and as time passes by,I only learn living with pain on and on,but some things don't ever go back to where they were.Yes,the pain leaves the scars.The vacation,itīs something worst for me,the Christmas especially.At that time I feel such lonely as never,because I have no family,my friends are very busy and before Christmas my beloved Jan died.The Christmas are anyway the saddest holiday of the year.Despite of everything Iīm staying a positive,smiling and kind person,trying my best I can as a strong person going on as my beloved Jan wish for all days long.Last time while I was walking down the street feeling gloomy again,I took a look at the woman on the pavement and I bought the magazine for homeless to help her;2 days ago I gave the money to another homeless to help him;the day before yesterday I also contributed to help the blind children...Then I felt better to make a smile again.I try my best I can to relieve the pain of anyone to feel good and to find a comfort in my suffering.People have lost a compassion,therefore everything goes down.If you could only know how much I do love my dearest Jan,more than everything all over the world as well as he always did and never stopped and as well as Iīll always do...
I feel hopeless too,therefore I feel happy here for the people just like you which I can be helped to,by listening,also giving an advice and of course to find a comfort for myself that I need so much...
Please,donīt be sad.You can write me anytime you want to...
Iīm here every day.This site is more real and the people in it more kind than elsewhere,thatīs why I hope that you find a support and comfort here as well as I look for...
Look forward to your post again!
Hugs from Janka