Author Topic: Hello 2014  (Read 2168 times)

arthur

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Hello 2014
« on: January 19, 2014, 06:44:24 PM »
Hi Everyone! Just thought I would check in with you all. I a still recovering from my shoulder surgery in November. It was an extensive surgery thus the recovery has been long and painful . I am still dating the wonderful woman I met last fall.. I count myself lucky to have met her.   Still grieving for Maureen..though there have been times that I thought I was mostly through it.  I guess I should' ve known better..such a horrible loss will take maybe a lifetime to get over.   I experienced ambush grief today when I went back to church today for the first time since my surgery in November. They announced the annual fundraiser carnival 2b held a few weeks from now. That bought back memories when Maureen and I because the last fundraiser I wS at at my church was when she was alive. I had to leave church a little early due to the pain in my shoulder and in my heart. They must all think I am mentally ill there.. They avoid me it seems. Well I hope everyone is doing as well as they can be with their own loss. Take care arthur

RobbieR

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Re: Hello 2014
« Reply #1 on: January 20, 2014, 08:32:38 AM »
Hi Arthur, It has been real quiet on this forum lately. I am sorry to hear that you still have a lot of pain with your shoulder. I guess something like that does take a long time to heal. I have always heard that shoulders were difficult. It is great that you are still dating your lady friend. I think that one day that will be good for me because I hate being alone so much. I have my daughter around a lot and it is great but not the same. I know about certain events that remind us of good times with our spouses. I see the valentines day stuff in the stores now and I just want to avoid it. Happy people on facebook talking about valentines day as well. I still have a lot of good support at church. When they ask me how I am, I am honest with them. They may be avoiding me soon. Today is rough for me for some reason. I am coming up on 3 months this week and it still hurts really bad sometimes. Probably always will.  God Bless   Robbie

Terry

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Re: Hello 2014
« Reply #2 on: January 20, 2014, 03:23:40 PM »

So nice to hear from you, Arthur and I love your post title, "Hello 2014!" Grief is like that sore shoulder in the sense that it will become less painful to use one day but will remain a constant reminder of the injury. The scars from love and loss are what we all learn to live with.

Thanks for the update on how you're doing. I imagine the fundraiser brought back so many memories for you.

"There can be no deep disappointment where there is not deep love." Martin Luther King, Jr. ( Happy Birthday)

Take special care of yourself, Arthur and know that I always think of you, with love. :love4:

Love & Big Hugs,

((((((((( Arthur )))))))))

Terry


Diane5636

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Re: Hello 2014
« Reply #3 on: January 21, 2014, 07:58:28 PM »
It is nice to hear some positive things, Arthur. I send you wishes for continued healing of your shoulder and continued progress as you walk through grief. I guess progress is all we can ask for sometimes. Robbie, 3 months was very difficult for me, I send you prayers and encouragement. It doesn't get easier, but it does get 'different'.  Terry, your encouragement and sweet comments on here shine like a candle to me sometimes. Thank you. I hated facing 2014, my first full year without my husband, but I know I can “do life" and work through my grief as well. Hugs to all as this year moves on  ---  Diane

Terry

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Re: Hello 2014
« Reply #4 on: January 21, 2014, 10:31:51 PM »
Hi Arthur, It has been real quiet on this forum lately. I am sorry to hear that you still have a lot of pain with your shoulder. I guess something like that does take a long time to heal. I have always heard that shoulders were difficult. It is great that you are still dating your lady friend. I think that one day that will be good for me because I hate being alone so much. I have my daughter around a lot and it is great but not the same. I know about certain events that remind us of good times with our spouses. I see the valentines day stuff in the stores now and I just want to avoid it. Happy people on facebook talking about valentines day as well. I still have a lot of good support at church. When they ask me how I am, I am honest with them. They may be avoiding me soon. Today is rough for me for some reason. I am coming up on 3 months this week and it still hurts really bad sometimes. Probably always will.  God Bless   Robbie

Robbie, you have my heart. Early grief is so very difficult and just the beginning of a long journey to healing your heart. I'm glad you're posting. It really helps, a lot. When I first came to the boards my posts looked more like short stories. But I was getting my feelings out and it kept me sane.

Always here for you. :love9:

Love,
Terry

Terry

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Re: Hello 2014
« Reply #5 on: January 21, 2014, 10:33:12 PM »
It is nice to hear some positive things, Arthur. I send you wishes for continued healing of your shoulder and continued progress as you walk through grief. I guess progress is all we can ask for sometimes. Robbie, 3 months was very difficult for me, I send you prayers and encouragement. It doesn't get easier, but it does get 'different'.  Terry, your encouragement and sweet comments on here shine like a candle to me sometimes. Thank you. I hated facing 2014, my first full year without my husband, but I know I can “do life" and work through my grief as well. Hugs to all as this year moves on  ---  Diane

((((((((((Diane)))))))))) :love9:


MyLou

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Re: Hello 2014
« Reply #6 on: January 23, 2014, 04:54:18 PM »
Arthur,

I am sorry you are still in pain and wish you a speedy recovery.  I am happy for you that you are still with your wonderful lady.  You will never get over Maureen's death. We can't ever get over it.  We some how have to get through it and yes we are going to have our bad days still.  Please keep us updated on your recovery.


Robbie, You are so early in your grief. I remember everday was bad for me at 3 months. Don't be hard on yourself this is a hard journey. As for the displays of all the holidays it's hard. I use to try and avoid.  We are here for you.


Diane, It's hard facing a new year without our spouses but you can do life. A lot of times I thought I couldn't do it but I am still here.  We are here for you.

Sending peace, love , hugs,  :icon_flower:

Always,

Lisa
"Soulmates Forever"

I miss you every second of everyday My Love

I know I will see you again

arthur

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Re: Hello 2014
« Reply #7 on: January 29, 2014, 10:23:52 PM »
Hi Everyoneagain..just wanted to say a heartfelt thanks to all who responded to my post..
Robbie-Hang in there Robbie!..I know its only been 3 months and I imagine you must still be in shock. Know that you have come to the right place for your loss..the best place for our kind of loss on the web!The support You will receive here is unreal. Hang in there Robbie.
Terry..what can I say for such beautiful words Terry? Thank you with all my heart. Your compassion and love have helped me to heal so much.  You are a healer Terry. God Bless you ,you are a special person Terry!!:)))
Diane-I hope You can begin your recovery in 2014. I am so sorry for your loss. Yes I am afraid that you are right..whatever our lives were before our loss is gone and we are changed people because of our loss. Its the nature of life. Take care and hang in there Diane!
Lisa..you are so right. We'll never really get over our loss while we live. I was reminded again of this tonight while watching the news. I hope your loss goes better with you. Take care and thank you for your words!

Take care all of you and Thank you again for your support in my loss!:))
arthur