Author Topic: A tragic death  (Read 2811 times)

Adams Brokenhearted Mama

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A tragic death
« on: July 01, 2013, 02:40:28 PM »
My youngest has had a relationship with a beautiful girl on-off for several years now. I love her. Her Dad was driving home yesterday evening when a drunken driver plowed into him; killing him instantly. The intoxicated driver escaped with minor injuries.
My heart breaks for this family. I get so shook up these days. I just don't handle sad well at all.
Has any of your coping skills since the death of your child totally change? It's coming onto 7 years for me now.
XO Love to all my sisters & brothers-in-grief XO
Wishing you all peaceful moments, signs from your Angels & many blessings

AC Mom

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Re: A tragic death
« Reply #1 on: July 02, 2013, 06:11:17 AM »

I don't think we can go thru losing a child and not have it effect the way we handle/react to tragedy. 

I find myself getting over whelmed a lot faster than I use too.  It doesn't take much to bring tears to my eyes, and I never was a "cryer".  I always handled things internally and privately,  I don't find myself doing that much anymore.

Hope you have been well.


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Re: A tragic death
« Reply #2 on: July 03, 2013, 02:08:51 PM »

I've been to so many funerals since the deaths of my children and it's always difficult to say Good-Bye to someone I've loved. I, too find that my emotions are right on the surface and it can be difficult just watching the news sometimes without crying my eyes out. But, life is short, for everyone and I do what I need to do for me and don't really think too much about it. With so many years between losing Michelle and Jeff and the possibility of losing Jeff being so very slim, if we're talking 'odds' I've been on a roller coaster of sorts when it comes to adjusting as change is the only constant. It took awhile....

I agree that we change. Yes. A big part of us is missing. How could we not?

Take special care, Paula.



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Re: A tragic death
« Reply #3 on: July 09, 2013, 08:59:48 PM »
In some ways I cry more easily; in others way it takes more to make me upset.

When I hear of a tragic loss, I do tear up quickly, especially if a child is involved.  I think because it instantly makes me think of my own loss, and that pain is always so close to the surface and just doesn't seem to really lessen.  So it's in my face again, and I meltdown pretty quickly.

But in other ways, the loss of Vince has given me perspective so that things that used to seem so horrible don't seem so bad now.  For example, the man I had been dating for nearly a year broke up with me about six weeks after my son's death, and my friends and family took it harder than I did.  It just felt like . . . nothing to me. 

Like getting a mosquito bite after being hit by a semi-truck.  You don't really notice.

And I find that sort of thing continues - I mean, the everyday sort of stuff - losses and disappointments - that used to upset me . . . they feel like nothing now.   I've already survived the worst night of my life.  I know, for a certainty, that I'll never have worse one.  And while I wish I had never had to experience it, there is something freeing in that knowledge.

I'm really hard to threaten or frighten . . . everything feels like . . . . "sure, OK, bring it on - what more can anyone do to me?"
I love thee to the level of every day's Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light. -- Emily Dickinson

You were a gift


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Re: A tragic death
« Reply #4 on: July 14, 2013, 02:13:21 PM »
i'm sorry for your loss...
  we lost my cousin (TARA-32) IN MAY 2013 to an overdose... & no i don't do sad either... my coping skills just goes straight back to when CANDI was killed MAY 13,2005..  it's been 8 yrs. & my heart ache's everyday...

sending hug's,