Carol,
If only I had the words, but I do not. The singular comfort I can offer is to say you are in a place where we here have all been, or are still. Also know, that it has not been a very long time since you lost your husband, and what you are experiencing is normal. I was doing the same as you at the three month mark.
You are also doing all the right things, that is reaching out to counseling and joining a group. The group is important, at least it is to me, in that it was a safe place to let my feelings be known. All who attend feel the same. Friday was the fifth month since I lost my wife, and I still go weekly. And yes, I still have emotional periods, or break down when talking about some topics, but each day, and each time I step forward, I do better.
Try to stay with your knitting group, I know it is hard, especially when emotion overtakes you, but you need the socialization and a scheduled event. If you need to skip a session, that is ok, after all it is all about you, however do try and stick with it. Should an emotional time come on, excuse yourself if you feel uncomfortable doing it in front of others, then return if you are up to it.
I see you seem to not have a computer, that makes some things a bit difficult in communicating feelings, but not impossible. When you need to reach out, try to write down what you would say here or to another. Say the things you would say to a confidant. Write not in generalities, but about the specifics that are bothering you. Keep each writing in a journal. Every once and a while, read your earlier writings, and you will see progress.
As I have said here before, I do not squelch my grief, I try to understand it, and look for the good memory. It is not an easy thing to do, nor does it work for everyone, but for me it has helped a great deal.
I still talk to my wife when puttering around the house, or when I do something silly, or even just to say out loud how much I miss her. Some times it brings tears, although usually not any longer. Doing so always ends with a good feeling, even if I cry.
I wish I could be more helpful, but I believe you are on the right path.
Ray