Author Topic: Spring Check In  (Read 4468 times)

browneyedgirl

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Spring Check In
« on: April 11, 2012, 10:24:40 AM »
Hi Everyone ~

I thought I would start a thread "checking in".  There are many members that I haven't seen post in a little while, and I would love to hear from any/all of you.  

Anyone is welcome to post on this thread, of course. :) 

Please post if you like about how you're doing, anything new, or whatever you feel like posting.  

Lots of love.

Pam
« Last Edit: April 11, 2012, 01:19:50 PM by browneyedgirl »
Tony Repola 07/20/66 – 03/29/09
I know you are fishing in the oceans and streams of heaven

stampingwidow

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Re: Spring Check In
« Reply #1 on: April 11, 2012, 04:48:58 PM »
Good idea, hope people respond.

browneyedgirl

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Re: Spring Check In
« Reply #2 on: April 11, 2012, 04:52:33 PM »
Good idea, hope people respond.

Thank you, I do too ;)   There are somedays I can't post, I don't have the words, but I wanted to start a thread just seeing how everyone is doing, sort of a "mish mash thread" maybe for chit chat or sharing things that maybe is not a whole thread.  Hope that makes sense!  ;)   
Tony Repola 07/20/66 – 03/29/09
I know you are fishing in the oceans and streams of heaven

DaveB

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Re: Spring Check In
« Reply #3 on: April 11, 2012, 07:25:55 PM »
Well, I'm still around. Not much to say, nothing is new.

The days just grind by slowly. I feel a constant dull ache, with occasional sharp pangs of pain when I remember something I'd rather not. I don't know what the future holds, but I'm not all that interested anyway. I hike or run every day. I guess I like being out by myself, working up a sweat. I feel closer to God somehow. I can cry if I want, nobody knows.

I'm contemplating moving to a new place. I think I'd do better in new surroundings. I'm going to have a look at a place next week, a small place on a large property, kind of isolated. I hardly see anybody anymore anyway. I don't want to do any of this, but I have to do something. I don't want to live where I'm at without Judy, but I don't want to move either.

I haven't considered dating again. I remember just before I met Judy I had resigned myself to living alone, and now I've resigned myself to that again. God delivered her to me, put her right in front of me out of nowhere, I didn't have to do a thing. If he wants me to be with someone again, he'll do the same thing. I'm sure not going out of my way.

browneyedgirl

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Re: Spring Check In
« Reply #4 on: April 12, 2012, 10:02:45 AM »
(((((DaveB)))))

Thank you for posting.....I would be interested in hearing more about the move after you look at the property. 

lots of love.
Tony Repola 07/20/66 – 03/29/09
I know you are fishing in the oceans and streams of heaven

joearmitage

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Re: Spring Check In
« Reply #5 on: April 12, 2012, 11:29:37 AM »
I haven't posted for a while, but visit the site every evening and read everything new.
At work things are a bit easier for me lately, I seem to get through the day because my mind is normally on other things, although thoughts of Elaine are never far from the surface.
Mornings before I go to work, and evenings when I return home are emotional. Looking at a picture of Elaine brings the tears on, a sense of loss I suppose, knowing I will never again see that beautiful person in this life. I can function pretty good, and am getting used to living alone for the first time ever really. I have two cats, and they are really good company for me.
Yesterday 11th April would have been our 29th wedding anniversary, 30 years since we were engaged, and 31 years since we met. I can remember her face from that day we first met through mutual friends, the start of the best years of my life. Miss you Baby.

Joe
x
And can it be that in a world so full and busy the loss of one creature makes a void so wide and deep that nothing but the width and depth of eternity can fill it up

browneyedgirl

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Re: Spring Check In
« Reply #6 on: April 12, 2012, 12:45:10 PM »
(((Joe))

Thank you for posting.  I have been "looking" for you :

http://webhealing.com/forums/index.php/topic,7753.0.html

:)

Animals always help, it's sort of like they "know" we need them.  Glad to hear you're doing a little better.  
Tony Repola 07/20/66 – 03/29/09
I know you are fishing in the oceans and streams of heaven

Pookiesguy

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Re: Spring Check In
« Reply #7 on: April 12, 2012, 06:39:05 PM »
I'm still checking in daily too. Although work is occupying my mind during the day, I still get all choked up at the craziest
things, I used to always have tools on my Christmas list, and now everything from my cordless drill to my wrenches makes me
think of Jeanne, mostly when I'm cleaning them up after a job. It will be a 1 month the day after tomorrow on the 14th, don't
know how thats going to work out. I visit the cemetary and pray for her and me every day and don't go to bed till 2 or 3 in
the morning, but I feel like I'm settleing into the routine and it seems comforting. Is it wierd that I feel guilty when I take over the responsibilities that she used to do? Cleaning and paying bills etc. Anyway, sorry for rattling on. As I expected, everyone is going on with their lives with their families, and I am spending more and more time alone, and trying to cope with that has been difficult to say the least. I don't post much because left to my own devices I could write volumes and probably bore you to sleep so, again, sorry if I ramble but I've never been in a forum before, and I worry about breaking etiquette. My prayers and hugs to all who have helped me during this darkest hour of my life.


  (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((TO ALL))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
« Last Edit: April 12, 2012, 06:41:19 PM by Pookiesguy »

rayinsc

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Re: Spring Check In
« Reply #8 on: April 12, 2012, 09:23:42 PM »
This forum is not just for reading, it is for posting.  There is something therapeutic about writing down your feels for others to understand.  I have found that those people who have 'moved' on with their lives have not really moved on.  They just do not know how to deal with our grief, nor do we know how to open to them.  

What we are experiencing is dreaded by those who have yet to experience it.  It is a painful time for us, and they do not want to be reminded that in time they too will experience it.

We on the other hand have withdrawn into the the void of grief and while we want company, usually we do not.

So post away here, we understand.

One month is a terrible time and my time there is still fresh in my mind.  As I approach the two month mark, somehow it seems not so terrible, still bad, but not so terrible.

Ray in Santa Cruz

sevenofwands

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Re: Spring Check In
« Reply #9 on: April 13, 2012, 05:30:18 AM »
A very good idea Browneyedgirl to have this thread.  While I am at it I shall just re-introduce myself.  Sevenofwands, from Ireland.  (Our online friend here, dear Kevin, who left this world in 2009, used to call me 7ofNine. L.)

I feel for the pain of everyone here who has lost a dear one.  At times it is difficult to know what to say, in the fear of saying the wrong thing, no matter how well-intentioned.
Grief takes a time to work through, and the time is different for everyone. 

I don't think there is a person in the world who has not experienced the grief of loss, the death of a loved one.  You, I, everyone.  Even the very young will have lost someone, maybe a grand-parent, uncle, and in cases, a sibling.

Today I received in the post a "Memoriam Card" from the daughter of a very good friend of our family, who died last year.  He was part of our life, kind, supportive, sensible, and I miss him a lot.  His wife pre-deceased him, and while his daughters and son were very good to him, and caring, I know he missed his wife hugely.  Anyhow, I have the memoriam card here before me, and there he is, smiling at me from the little photo. I'll just transcribe a small part at random  of the poem which is on the card (a lovely choice IMO):


"To my dearest family
Some things I'd like to say,
But first of all to let you know
That I arrived okay

(and then he addresses his friends)

When you are walking down the street
And you've got me on your mind
I'm walking in your footsteps
Only half a step behind."

In the space of a few years I seem to have attended so many funerals, for people very close to me/
Death is part of life, but the departure is never easy, for anyone.  I know that others close to me will go too, and I would so like for them all to live forever.  I don't dread the experience,  but I wish they could stay. 

Best to everyone
Seven

Doug1222

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Re: Spring Check In
« Reply #10 on: April 13, 2012, 08:53:25 AM »
Even the very young will have lost someone, maybe a grand-parent, uncle, and in cases, a sibling.

Good point, sevenofwands...and a beautiful post. Our youngest son just lost his best friend this week. He's only 25, and he's already lost several close friends (one to suicide). His biological dad was also murdered in 2000 when he was barely a teenager. This one was his roommate for a couple years. They were very close, and he's having a really hard time with it. It was due to drinking. His friend wasn't driving. He was drunk in the vehicle. Unfortunately, the driver was, also. She ran the car into a pond. She was able to get out, but his friend (and another young man) weren't capable. The burial is today.

It's so sad. He was a funny kid. All we can really do for our son at this point is pray for him. We all feel really helpless, but it's something he's got to work his way through. Some of life's lessons are awful hard.

I really just felt a need to respond to that point, but I suppose I should check in while I'm here. I'm Doug, and I just got here a few months ago. I was experiencing what I thought was a mid-life crisis, but I'm now sure it was delayed grief. I lost my younger brother in 1995 (at 22), and my dad in 2000 (at 57). Both were young, healthy, happy, and killed in vehicle accidents suddenly. I posted a lot when I first got here, but I'm feeling better now. I'll post more again when I need to...and I'm sure I will.

I'm really just now getting past the shock. Everyone here has been wonderful, and I think it has helped me a lot to share with all of you.

(((((((((((Everyone)))))))))))

Doug

browneyedgirl

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Re: Spring Check In
« Reply #11 on: April 13, 2012, 09:27:25 AM »
((((Pookiesguy)))) - I second what Ray said..post away

(((Ray)))

((Seven)))

(((Doug)))
I am so sorry for the loss of your son's friends, that is awful.   :tearyeyed:

thank you all for posting! 
Tony Repola 07/20/66 – 03/29/09
I know you are fishing in the oceans and streams of heaven

Terry

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Re: Spring Check In
« Reply #12 on: April 13, 2012, 11:19:05 AM »

This was a great idea, Pam! We get to see how everyone is doing, what is new, etc. Everyone on this board is so supportive of one another, it's a joy to come over here.

Love you ((((((((guys and Pammy)))))))), too!
Terry

browneyedgirl

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Re: Spring Check In
« Reply #13 on: April 13, 2012, 01:40:31 PM »

This was a great idea, Pam! We get to see how everyone is doing, what is new, etc. Everyone on this board is so supportive of one another, it's a joy to come over here.

Love you ((((((((guys and Pammy)))))))), too!
Terry

;)
Tony Repola 07/20/66 – 03/29/09
I know you are fishing in the oceans and streams of heaven

MyLou

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Re: Spring Check In
« Reply #14 on: April 14, 2012, 02:57:05 AM »
(((((((((((((((((( PAM )))))))))))))))))))

I'm trying to figure my NEW LIFE/ME out. It's way to hard to figure out anymore.  I get so tired of thinking but can't shut the switch off. Oh how I wish I could. 


Always,

Lisa
"Soulmates Forever"

I miss you every second of everyday My Love

I know I will see you again