Author Topic: yea, it's finally over  (Read 2613 times)

ittybitty's mom

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yea, it's finally over
« on: December 26, 2006, 02:33:34 AM »
Thank God xmas is over.  Brought my Jess' stuff from her apartment(clothes and stuff)  a few weeks ago.  Thought I could spend xmas with her by sitting in her bedroom floor sorting through it.  Thought it would make me feel close to her.  I was sooooo wrong.  Ended up crying/yelling and being mean to my husband.  Nothing is good enough anymore and I don't know if it ever will be.  Wound up going to get my dad from his assisted living home and took him to Friday's to eat.  That changed the subject for me, which was good. 
My first birthday without her is the 31st, and my son's first birthday without his sister is Jan 2nd.  This is too hard.  I feel for all of you who've been going through this longer than I have.  I've been reading the posts for a while now and it makes me have hope. 
I did have a pleasant time with family at my brother's on xmas eve.  Hardly any crying.  I hope everybody has good family /friends.  I couldn't do this without them.  I miss her too much.


Karen Paul

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Re: yea, it's finally over
« Reply #1 on: December 26, 2006, 06:38:54 AM »
I am with you, glad it is over.. although it sounds like you have a tough week coming up with birthdays... all those firsts are so so hard and there is no way around it.... glad you got to see your dad, I'm sure he was grateful to spend time with you...

Every year seems to be different.. Christopher has been gone three years, but this was our fourth Christmas without him... the first was a blur of shock and silence.. the second my brother just couldn't do... last year we started new traditions of putting notes and memories in Chris' stocking (to be pulled out and read this year and add more).. and our candle lighting ceremony, which Brian (my bro, Chris' dad) liked very much so we did that again this year... it helps to have traditions that include Chris and allows us to talk about him more....

luv and hugs, Karen
proud aunt of Christopher

Dottie (Tammie's Mom)

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Re: yea, it's finally over
« Reply #2 on: December 26, 2006, 07:06:01 AM »
I too am so very glad it's over. Although even without the holidays my life is empty and so quiet without Tammie.

It is so difficult facing special dates without our children, I don't think it will ever be easy. This is our second Christmas without Tammie, I thought it was just as bad as the first.

Thinking of you, Hold on,
Dottie Tammie's Mom


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Re: yea, it's finally over
« Reply #3 on: December 26, 2006, 05:20:54 PM »
The first are so hard, josh passed away in may his sister's birthday was in june, his birthay was in July and mine was in september, this is our first to.. today will make it 7 months since Josh's accident i still feel the pain as if it was today...

good luck on the long road ahead, we all need it, thaoughts and prayers
love virgie  JOSH'S MOM


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Re: yea, it's finally over
« Reply #4 on: December 26, 2006, 08:51:11 PM »
I was kind of ambivalent to the whole holiday hoopla. I do very much look forward to being with all my family, and seeing them happy, and of course the good food! HOWEVER, I AM SOOOOO glad it's allllll over!