Author Topic: Intensive Care  (Read 1230 times)

helene

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Intensive Care
« on: February 09, 2012, 12:34:37 PM »
Hello. I mainly post on Sibling Loss but I also lost my Dad way back in 1983. You'd think I'd be over his death by now but I'm not. I have never been able to recover even though it's nearly been 30 years. I thought I'd share this poem with you.

INTENSIVE CARE

Let's start with a memory. Any memory you have. A memory of him.

Through the door and down the long hall, turn to the right,
And into the room of intensive care, Dad is there.
So much in his mouth, tubes and such, that all I want to do is turn away,
Remembering how, in such a pathetic way, Dad had asked the doctors:
"Will I ever be able to sing again?" And I screamed to the universe:
"No, he won't, will he! He is dying, DYING, and there will be no more singing - ever!"
The nurse enters intensive care while I look back at my Dad who cannot talk,
I babble inanely at him about my day as if we had all the time, time, time in the world  and I ask the nurse:
"Do you think it would be ok if I kissed my Dad goodbye?" and the nurse said:
"Why don't you look at him and find out." so I do and I see my Dad trying to smile,
His eyes wide and eager silently crying out to me saying: "Yes! Yes! Kiss me goodbye!"
Later that night I sit alone  in the kitchen when my mother suddenly appears and says:
"Your father is gone." then she turns and abuptly leaves the room.
This  then was to never return again because he was always there all that time,
Me: spinning out far past all orbits while sliding down slippery slopes,
Memories covered in ink, filmy-wet I feel the drops trickling through,
To stare at me down the long halls as each day comes and goes in that dark,
Until this day when you ask: Let's start with a memory, any memory you have.
A memory of him.


Love from Helene


Helene & Lesley