Author Topic: A.D.D.  (Read 5638 times)

jcohenx

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 11
    • View Profile
A.D.D.
« on: December 15, 2010, 08:06:37 PM »
Almost immediately after my wife died I found that I began to contract a lot of symptoms of A.D.D.  I try to do something simple like find my hat before going out and I get side-tracked, then side-tracked again, and the next thing I know I am trying to do 6 things at once and getting none of them done.  Someone told me that this may persist for about a year.  Has anybody else had the same experience?

thanks,

jc

Terry

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 5951
    • “Grief is like the ocean; it comes on waves ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is calm, and sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn to swim.” –Vicki Harrison
    • View Profile
Re: A.D.D.
« Reply #1 on: December 15, 2010, 10:49:09 PM »
Almost immediately after my wife died I found that I began to contract a lot of symptoms of A.D.D.  I try to do something simple like find my hat before going out and I get side-tracked, then side-tracked again, and the next thing I know I am trying to do 6 things at once and getting none of them done.  Someone told me that this may persist for about a year.  Has anybody else had the same experience?

thanks,

jc

JC,

It's very common to have difficulty concentrating for long periods while grieving. To become confused easily. Disoriented during familiar activities. It's all a part of grieving.

Please have patience with yourself and know that your mind is no longer occupied with the everyday mundane chores/tasks...they are just not as important as they once were!

I know many or all on here will relate to this post and maybe someone else will share their thoughts with you!

My love,
Terry

johnkmurray

  • nospam
  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 295
    • View Profile
Re: A.D.D.
« Reply #2 on: December 18, 2010, 01:12:11 PM »
Almost immediately after my wife died I found that I began to contract a lot of symptoms of A.D.D.  I try to do something simple like find my hat before going out and I get side-tracked, then side-tracked again, and the next thing I know I am trying to do 6 things at once and getting none of them done.  Someone told me that this may persist for about a year.  Has anybody else had the same experience?

I've been like that since my wife died last April. Does it fade after about a year? I can't say for sure as it hasn't been that long, but so far I'm still experiencing ... Oh look, a puppy!

jcohenx

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 11
    • View Profile
Re: A.D.D.
« Reply #3 on: December 19, 2010, 09:32:54 PM »
Hi John;

LOL.  I totally have those moments too.  It's only been a couple months for me.  Keep me posted on your progress.


arthur

  • nospam
  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 298
  • ((Maureen))
    • View Profile
Re: A.D.D.
« Reply #4 on: April 23, 2011, 12:38:01 PM »
Yes I guess its normal...my wife just died less than 2 weeks ago and I am displaying the same symptoms as you are..I can't concentrate on anything..and I jump from 1 unfinished task to another..how disturbing!

johnkmurray

  • nospam
  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 295
    • View Profile
Re: A.D.D.
« Reply #5 on: April 23, 2011, 03:44:06 PM »
Yes I guess its normal...my wife just died less than 2 weeks ago and I am displaying the same symptoms as you are..I can't concentrate on anything..and I jump from 1 unfinished task to another..how disturbing!

Arthur,

Hang in there brother, it does get better in time. I could barely tie my own shoes after I lost Kit. I wandered around the house aimlessly, starting new tasks and not getting past the "I gotta do this" stage before getting distracted by the next. Here I am a year later and I still haven't accomplished many of those things ... but I'm able to put things in perspective. Many of those tasks were my brain trying desperately to give me a purpose after losing my wife. There I was, after 17 yrs of marriage and one year as caregiver to a cancer patient and all of a sudden there was this big void in my life - no 'honey-do' list, no medication schedule to maintain, no doctors appointments or treatments to take her to. Most of all, that several hours each evening when we would just lie together and hold each other, trying to hold the inevitable at bay, those hours were now empty. Still are. That little voice in the back of your mind tells you that you should be doing ... something ... anything ... that this new state you're in isn't normal.

Well, it does get better. Concentration is improved. It has only been a couple of weeks for you, so give yourself time. Please accept my condolences on your loss, and welcome.

Regards,
John

browneyedgirl

  • nospam
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 2320
    • View Profile
Re: A.D.D.
« Reply #6 on: April 25, 2011, 08:50:13 AM »
Yes I guess its normal...my wife just died less than 2 weeks ago and I am displaying the same symptoms as you are..I can't concentrate on anything..and I jump from 1 unfinished task to another..how disturbing!

Welcome Arthur......I am so sorry for the loss of your wife. 

As you can see, there are many people here that can relate to how you are feeling.  Please feel free to start a new thread telling us about your wife, if you like. 

Take care of yourself.
Tony Repola 07/20/66 – 03/29/09
I know you are fishing in the oceans and streams of heaven

Terry

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 5951
    • “Grief is like the ocean; it comes on waves ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is calm, and sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn to swim.” –Vicki Harrison
    • View Profile
Re: A.D.D.
« Reply #7 on: April 25, 2011, 04:40:36 PM »
Hi Arthur,

I'm so sorry about your wife. Welcome to our Webhealing family where others have also lost someone dear to them and are struggling to rebuild their lives, with the help from others here.

Come back and tell us about your wife, when you feel comfortable doing so. There is always someone here to listen and to send you a big hug!

Know we care, very much.

((((((((((((((Arthur)))))))))))))

My Love,
Terry

mousewife

  • nospam
  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 277
    • View Profile
Re: A.D.D.
« Reply #8 on: April 26, 2011, 09:20:31 PM »
JC,

I'm sorry you lost your wife.  Also, sorry I never saw this post until now.  I was very much the same as you describe after my husband's death.  It does get better, but I am sure that is also on an individual time table.  It's been over four years for me, and I'm not sure I'll ever get back to the organized task oriented mind I used to have.

The line about the puppy was so funny and appropriate.  I think that gave us all a laugh and shows how important a sense of humor can be in getting us through heart-wrenching, all- consuming pain.  Some of which I have just had tonight.  For some reason I remembered a time when I came upstairs to hear my husband wimpering, setting on the bed, trying to cry.  He was never able to really cry. When I asked him what was worng he just asked" Why does everything always have to be so hard for me?".  It just broke my heart then and it just did now.  My husband was the sweetest, gentlest person, who was so loving and never would hurt another person, and yet God allowed him to have two brain illness,  The cancer took every last function he had.  It stripped him bit by bit of his normal abilities until at last it stripped him of his life.  I will never be able to understand why he had to be hurt in this way, nor why I have to keep reliving these moments and being broken all over again.  If it wasn't for my sense of humor and my sweet little cat I don't think I could keep making it.

I hope the rest of you are doing better than I tonight.  Just a really bad thing to remember and some difficult and discouraging news has me feeling so down.  I am really greatful that I can still come here and spill and least some of my guts sometimes...oh, look, there's that puppy again.

Peace and Healing,
mousewife