Hi Fireball Kid
I am so sorry for your loss, and all your pain and suffering, I hope that you can find strength from somewhere or someone, Would you consider going to a grief counselor or group, they really do help, I know how much your heart hurts, mine does to, I lost my husband of 43 years, on April 6, and I am finding it hard to live without him, he was me and I was him we were one. You can't give up, I keep pushing myself, even though I don;t want to, I know if I don't it will not be good, I will withdraw, and I am trying so hard not to do that, try to push yourself to do things and talk to people, I also go to work mindless, but it gets us out of the house for a while.
Don't give up, you will find strength
God Bless
(((((Hugs))))))
Karen