Author Topic: I'm New But...  (Read 3545 times)

Sidney

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I'm New But...
« on: May 12, 2009, 07:18:26 PM »
My husband died 2 1/2 years ago.  My father died 3 months before my husband.  I've been getting through it on my own through stubborn determination.  I'm tired of feeling so sad and frightened.  I finally think I need some help.
Sidney

patty

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Re: I'm New But...
« Reply #1 on: May 12, 2009, 09:13:32 PM »
Hello Sidney.  It took me years before I finally was able to write here.  I donīt know if I was afraid to let my feelings out on line or what.  I guess I was shellshocked.

I know that most of the posts are from those with recent losses but everybody is different.  I lost my husband 7 years ago and I still am so raw I hate to admit it.  There is no timetable.  I think a lot depends on a personīs circumstances like if they have family, friends, somebody to talk to. 
    The folks here are more than willing to listen to your story and offer support.  This is the only place I can really talk about greif, I donīt have anybody else who can listen and help.  Youīve come to the right place.  Regards, Patty

Luvinmike

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Re: I'm New But...
« Reply #2 on: May 13, 2009, 04:17:51 AM »
Dear Sidney;
     I am so sorry for the loss of your husband, and your father. It is good to tell of your love and grief, I agree with Patty so much. Keeping you close in thought Sidney and please tell us about yourself when you are able to and if you want.
Sincerely, Terri

georgiapeaches

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Re: I'm New But...
« Reply #3 on: May 13, 2009, 05:02:36 AM »
Dear Sidney,
I'm so sorry for your losses. I 'm glad you decided to come for support, this is really a nice little group and it will benefit you alot to get your feelings out, welcome.

Georgia.
MOM                        JOHNNY
 

tsurandy

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Re: I'm New But...
« Reply #4 on: May 13, 2009, 08:45:15 AM »
Hi Sidney, I am so sorry for the pain and loss you have suffered.  This is a place where you can express your thoughts and feelings without fear.  We are here to support one another. 
Peggy's Boy

Sad Eyes

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Re: I'm New But...
« Reply #5 on: May 13, 2009, 11:32:26 AM »
Hi Sidney,

First of all you have my sympathy for your losses.  Just because they are not recent losses doesn't mean you don't still feel the pain and sorrow that comes from having lost a loved one. This website is a great place to talk with others who also have lost loved ones.  You will find many compasionate people who are willing to help you with your grief.

Sad Eyes

Sidney

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Re: I'm New But...
« Reply #6 on: May 13, 2009, 11:33:00 AM »
Hello Patty, Terri, Georgia and Patty's Boy -

Thank you for welcoming me to this site.  This is a first for me.  I was slammed with the loss of both of the "men in my life" in 2006. My Dad died from a bone marrow disease that came on suddenly - 6 weeks after diagnosis and, my husband was diagnosed with cancer 3 weeks before my Dad died.  After Garth, my husband, died many people suggested grief counseling.  I couldn't think of anything that would make me feel worse.  All of my energy was needed to get through the "tasks" that I had to take on as a surviving widow with children.  I had given up my law practice to help my husband with his business when he was diagnosed with cancer.  It was the business that primarily supported our family and we needed to keep it going.  Garth was 52, strong and seemed to be in perfect health but he died four months after diagnosis.  After he died, I took his business over completely.  I have been trying to manage all of the work, family, household, and grief by being a champion widow.  I have terrific friends and family who support me.  I have written regularly in a journal and I have read a lot about grief.  This has worked mostly.  I am certainly better than I was during the first year.  I now have long stretches of no crying.  I am just starting to find Sidney again.  For the longest time I didn't recognize the person that was me.  I was desperately sad; anxious; lonely; negative; and; I didn't like myself.  I had no sense of a future.  It was completely blank - no goals or dreams at all.  I have lifted myself out of the worst of it and I hope that this will be encouraging to those who are still at the beginning of their grief.  Still, I am so vunerable and that throws me.  I wonder will I ever really be happy again?  Why does life have to be so hard?  I really don't know if I can take much more dissapointment and heartache.  This economy scares me, our business is slow.  Do I need to lose everything!?  Will I ever be loved again?  I miss my Dad and I miss Garth.  I am tired of being a champion.

Thanks for listening.

Sidney
Sidney

Sidney

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Re: I'm New But...
« Reply #7 on: May 13, 2009, 11:35:42 AM »
Thank you Sad Eyes and I'm sorry for getting your name wrong Peggy's Boy.  It really is nice to have your support

Sidney
Sidney

browneyedgirl

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Re: I'm New But...
« Reply #8 on: May 13, 2009, 12:07:35 PM »
Sidney ~ i am so sorry for your losses.  I lost my older brother, I couldn't imagine losing two men in my life.
My thoughts are with you.
Tony Repola 07/20/66 – 03/29/09
I know you are fishing in the oceans and streams of heaven