Author Topic: Missing my husband!!!  (Read 3606 times)

rocheshelt

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Missing my husband!!!
« on: April 25, 2009, 10:52:13 AM »
I recently lost my husband April 21st, 2009. We were a fairly young couple he was 32 and I am 33 and married for 8 years our 9th anniv. Will be in July. He was on dialysis and had other illnesses. The sad thing is that he was a very active person and no one really knew the extint of his illness. We were just joking and talking to each other around 3am and then around 5am he was dead. I am still shocked and it has been a couple of days. I am so sad and heartbroken that I really do not know what to do. We also have 4 children ages 3, 7, 10 and 12. 3 of them are the both of ours and then we have his daughter who lived with us since she was 3 months all of them were at home at the time of his death  and basically saw him die right before our eyes. I am crying off and on everyday and sometimes I am feeling ok because I know he is in a better place and he his no longer suffering.

Jeanne

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Re: Missing my husband!!!
« Reply #1 on: April 25, 2009, 11:56:46 AM »
I am so sorry for your loss.My husband had a trach and feeding tube.I am like you-I know he is free from pain-But I am feeling lost -
I have read several books.A Grief Observed by C.S.Lewis and the 1 I got this site from-Don't Let Death Ruin Your life by Jill Brooke-

georgiapeaches

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Re: Missing my husband!!!
« Reply #2 on: April 25, 2009, 12:08:22 PM »
Dear Roch,
I am so sorry for your loss, so sorry that your childred have to go through this. Do you have any extended family that can help you through this? I have 3 teens and I know how hard it is. My heart goes out to you and your family.

Georgia.
MOM                        JOHNNY
 

Luvinmike

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Re: Missing my husband!!!
« Reply #3 on: April 25, 2009, 03:37:10 PM »
Dear Rocheshelt;
I am also sorry for your loss. Sorry for the unimaginable experiences you have endured recently. You continue to be brave and alsk for help with the kids. It will be good for you to care for youself as best you can. It seems strange when our loved ones don't, "Need",  us like before. It can be so scary in the beginning, we are all here with you. Sending strength. Terri

Jap Jr

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Re: Missing my husband!!!
« Reply #4 on: April 25, 2009, 04:01:28 PM »
Rocheshelt;

So sorry you and your children had to go through that, and all so young. I pray you will find some peace. Do you have family near you or maybe neighbors to help with the kids, so you can get to a grief group? And some help for the children? It is 5 months for me and I miss Jim so much; the pain and heartache are still so new/raw for me. I cry everyday; the rollercoaster and waves of emotions. Come back and let us know how you are. Prayers, peace and strength.

Jap Jr's - Kay





carrieset

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Re: Missing my husband!!!
« Reply #5 on: April 25, 2009, 10:30:54 PM »
I am so sorry for your loss of the man you so loved.  It is heartbreaking for me to read your post.

It is hard days and very early and fresh and raw for you.  I am glad you found this site to post so early on.

We understand your pain and are praying for you.  It is a very difficult journey.  Make sure you take care of yourself first; like so many told me early on.  If you can't eat, make sure you drink water, Gatorade, Ensure.  I lost 20 lbs. in 2 months and I was already very tiny.

Get as much help as you can; it is hard to do even the simplest things.  Breathe, breathe breathe.  One moment at a time, don't think about tomorrow or next week, just right now.

This site has saved my life.  Just keep on coming here to vent, cry, rant and rave.  We have all done it.

Luv and hugs to U,

Carrie

rocheshelt

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Re: Missing my husband!!!
« Reply #6 on: April 26, 2009, 02:51:38 PM »
Today started ok then I just started to feel this heaviness and just broke down crying and could not stop. I just feel so cheated and heartbroken. We were suppose to spend forever together not just eight years. It just feels like I am not going to be able to make it without him. The kids are going on with their playing (is that normal?). The funeral services will be on Wed. I am dreading getting out of  bed because I do not want to come the the relization that this has really happened and not just a bad dream that I am going to wake up from.

pussikins

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Re: Missing my husband!!!
« Reply #7 on: April 27, 2009, 01:06:18 AM »
hi..i lost my precious mark on 17th february 2009..he was 58 years old.
12 years of marital bliss...no kids
i can so relate to you.....it is tough...not going to say it is going to be easy.
10 weeks have passed and i still cry like it just happened.
i thought we would grow old together... 
yesterday i was a mess..went home and just broke down..cos i have since been living with my parents as cannot face the flat on my own...call me a coward...i have tried but i really cannot take it.
will probably sell and find a home closer to my parents but have been told not to take any major decisions in the first year .
my thoughts are with u and with all of us on this site...