Author Topic: PLEASE PRAY FOR ME TODAY; DREADED DR APPT AFTER LONG TIME OF CAREGIVING  (Read 4397 times)

carrieset

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Hi all:

Please pray for me on Friday as I am going to have blood pressure checked again and full physical after many years.

After 2.8 years of taking care of Laurence with aggressive brain tumors, I now know I have to take care of me.  And I don't feel so great.  Lost my health insurance after Laurence's first surgery because of lack of focus to work and taking care of him.  Anyway got back insurance at the end of October and now need to get my health back.   He died 7 weeks ago and it has taken a huge toll on me physically and in every other way.

Caregiving is a tough job, especially when you in the end have to watch for 2 months someone lose their mind right in front of you.  A beautiful man, with a beautiful mind, left me.............

 :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(

Thank you all for your support and encouragement.  It's been a long journey for me.  As Laurence called all of this,  "opporunities to trust God" and he did.

Now he is gone and I need to trust God to provide for me financially and health-wise.

Peace and prayers to all of you,

Carrie

LLM

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Re: PLEASE PRAY FOR ME TODAY; DREADED DR APPT AFTER LONG TIME OF CAREGIVING
« Reply #1 on: February 13, 2009, 08:58:39 AM »
I will pray for you. It has been 7 weeks since I lost my Zak also. I just found his blood pressure kit that he was using to monitor his blood pressure and there was a piece of paper in there with his numbers and readings from a few years ago on it and it just killed me to see that. I have started taking mine and it is way up.

I know we both miss our loved ones so much. I truly don't know how I am making it through this. I feel myself sinking into a deep depression and I don't care. I never imagined how hard losing someone you love so much could be.

You are in my prayers.

Laura

Jap Jr

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Re: PLEASE PRAY FOR ME TODAY; DREADED DR APPT AFTER LONG TIME OF CAREGIVING
« Reply #2 on: February 13, 2009, 09:16:09 AM »
carrie;

thoughts go out to you today as you go to the Dr; take some deep breaths; even though you will probably have to do more when you get there. Know it is for your own good health reasons, to have the full physical after all you have been through the past 2.8 years.

peace and prayers back to you.

Jap Jr's - Kay

georgiapeaches

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Re: PLEASE PRAY FOR ME TODAY; DREADED DR APPT AFTER LONG TIME OF CAREGIVING
« Reply #3 on: February 13, 2009, 09:17:23 AM »
Carrie,
I think you'll be fine. I do think however the doctor is going to tell you to eat something more than ensure and banana's  :-\ take the advice. You sound like your falling apart so just do so and let the doctor help you. We all need to ask for help from time to time. I will be thinking of you and praying for you, all the best . Let us know how you do.

Georgia.
MOM                        JOHNNY
 

friedgen

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Re: PLEASE PRAY FOR ME TODAY; DREADED DR APPT AFTER LONG TIME OF CAREGIVING
« Reply #4 on: February 13, 2009, 10:10:48 AM »
Thank you for your comforting words to my most recent post.  Please take care of your health.  You deserve to be healthy and happy.  At least healthy and happy when you are ready.  Take care.



Friedgen

kevinjj

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Re: PLEASE PRAY FOR ME TODAY; DREADED DR APPT AFTER LONG TIME OF CAREGIVING
« Reply #5 on: February 13, 2009, 10:05:19 PM »
You certainly are in  my thoughts and best wishes and I truly hope they find only plain old exhaustion and nothing very serious. I never really had to be a caretaker for my wife but did have to keep a closer eye on her diabetes the last couple of years but it was nothing.

carrieset

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Re: PLEASE PRAY FOR ME TODAY; DREADED DR APPT AFTER LONG TIME OF CAREGIVING
« Reply #6 on: February 13, 2009, 10:52:13 PM »
LLM:

I am at the 7 week mark like you are; I too find myself sinking and I am on antidepressants and anxiety medication.  It's frightening for me as I am very busy person before he died and I am struggling daily to keep myself going.  He was my comfort during the long illness and feel pretty comfortless right now.

My kids left tonight to go back to their dad's for his week with them.  I just dreaded 6:00 rolling around; alone again; 4 years ago I felt like I lost my kids during their young years only getting them half the time.  Now the loss of Laurence and empty days and nights.

I am there for you; I understand and pray for my new friends on this site,

Carrie

carrieset

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Re: PLEASE PRAY FOR ME TODAY; DREADED DR APPT AFTER LONG TIME OF CAREGIVING
« Reply #7 on: February 13, 2009, 10:55:32 PM »
kevinjj and everyone:

Thank you for your prayers.  However, the appointment had to be rescheduled to next week as I had arranged for 11 year old to go home with her friend after school.  But the friend decided she was going home with someone else and my daughter was not invited.  So to have the appointment at 1:30 and have to pick her up at 2:30 wasn't going to fly.  As we now a 1:30 appt usually means 2:30 and then out of the dr's office by 4:00, maybe.

Am just praying for good results here; am a little fragile right now and I need a good report.

Blessings to all,

Carrie

Michelle C

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Re: PLEASE PRAY FOR ME TODAY; DREADED DR APPT AFTER LONG TIME OF CAREGIVING
« Reply #8 on: February 14, 2009, 07:56:11 PM »
Gotta agree with Georgia..... ensure and banana's for u young lady... Take them until u get in to see the dr...

Next tuesday... It will be 6 weeks... I counted this morning and it's been 39 days... Can I go back please??? At times it seems like just yesterday and then at other times it seems like it happened a long time ago... Dont know if it is sinking in yet.. still look for his green car when I turn the corner...

thanks for listening...

MJ

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Re: PLEASE PRAY FOR ME TODAY; DREADED DR APPT AFTER LONG TIME OF CAREGIVING
« Reply #9 on: February 15, 2009, 04:52:26 PM »
I lost my husband on Thanksgiving 2008. We were together for 20 years. I will pray for your health as I pray for my own. My blood pressure has gone up and I am now on medication to control it. The first thing the doctor wanted to do was prescribe anti-depressants which I am not taking. I am depressed but I think that it is normal to be depressed after losing the love of your life, right? Masking it with mind numbing drugs isn't going to make the pain go away. Take care of yourself and your health but you don't have to listen to everything that doctors tell you. Sometimes I think they just don't understand - no one does until they have been there.

carrieset

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Re: PLEASE PRAY FOR ME TODAY; DREADED DR APPT AFTER LONG TIME OF CAREGIVING
« Reply #10 on: February 15, 2009, 05:58:50 PM »
MJ:

I am so sorry that you lost your wonderful husband to someone else's error.  How painful that is for you.  My heart goes out to you; this is the toughest journey I have ever been on. 

It has been almost 8 weeks since my partner (supposed to be marred) Laurence died on Christmas Eve morning.  I am still confused, heartbroken, fearful, angry, any emotion you can think of can come all at one time or all together.

I have never had blood pressure ever; it always really low, but I think the trauma of his passing and taking care of him almost all of last year took its toll.  I originally went to the Dr. to get antidepressants and anxiety medication as I have been on them in the past and could feel myself sinking.  But ended up with blood pressure meds, too.

Don't feel bad if you don't want to take the antidepressants.  I can tell you that they don't make the feelings go away; for me they take the edge off somewhat.  And, of course, who isn't depressed after the love of their life dies?  I would be amazed if someone told me they weren't.  That doesn't mean you have to take them.  Only you would know.

As for going back to work, I don't think that is the psychiatrist's call either.  That is between you and your employer and how you are feeling about it.

I work at home and I am finding it difficult after 8 weeks to function.  I was good the first 4 weeks working, but after some of the shock and numbness left I have pretty much just have been trying to get my health back, resting alot, reading grief books, posting on here, trying to eat.

Again, I am so sorry for such an unexpected loss of your soulmate.  There are alot of people here who are supportive and very encouraging and will understand what you are going through.

Hugs to U,

Carrie