Letter to DEATH

[grainofsand]

This is a letter I wrote to Death.  I invite anyone who would like to add to this, or write one of their own on this topic. 

Dear Death

You came into my life with no invitation.
No amount of locked doors was going to stop you.
Often I prayed to keep you away, as I knew you approaching.

There was no pleading with you, and you were not interested in making any bargains.
You are no respecter of persons; you take the young just as easily as the aged.
Your ways can be brutal, and despicable, taking human dignity with you.
You came in a brief moment, then you left me with a lifetime of heartache.

Your calling card is loneliness.  The constant and abundance of loneliness.

Do you ever look back to see my tears or how difficult life has become now for me?
When you stop a heart, don’t you understand that it beat with another?
Am I now supposed to find contentment with a photo and memories of my lost one?
Don’t you dare ask me to do that which is impossible, to accept this!

Tears are the only words my heart can speak, and it seems those conversations are plentiful.
The pain pierces my soul.
I use to fear you.
Not any more. 
I despise you.
You have changed me, lets just say, you have broken me.
I know no one gets a pardon from death but I just wish you didn’t come so soon…or at all.

Since your arrival nights are difficult to be alone with one’s thoughts.
Then the days it feels as if I am living in a different dimension than everyone else.
Death, you left me full of regrets of what I could of done, or should of done.
I am so keenly aware of you now, seems I feel like you are going to strike again.
I am anxious when another loved one takes a trip, I say to myself “will they be taken too”?

Your cloak of darkness is so heavy and tiresome to wear.
You make me question my God, and for that I hate you.
I hate you.  I hate you.

[laurenE]

Wow,  you are a very good writer.   What a great idea.  I never even thought to write a letter to death before.    Thanks for sharing this.  You've put into words what so many of us struggle with.

thank you.,

Lauren

[Luvinmike]

Dear GrainofSand;

     That is POWERFUL! Thank you!
p.s. I like your username. When I brought sixteen yr old son to beach this weekend we were in just thousands of people- I thought of your username. He asked me, " Mom, if there are so many billions of people on earth- do we really matter?" I told him, "Mikey, I don't have a clue about the rest of those billions, but we definitely matter to each other."  We miss our loved one and I hate this- so thanks for publishing your letter to death. Terri

[grainofsand]

Terri ..when I met my best friend Sandi (who is my grief) she was my dorm-mate in school.  When I met her...I despised her.  She was odd, difficult, eccentric...and tried my nerves more than anyone I ever knew. But like a "grain of sand" that finds its way into an oyster..the constant 'irritant' ends up becoming a beautiful priceless pearl.  She ended up being the closest person I had here on earth.

She was my grain of sand in this life....that grew to be the pearl, the greatest gift I ever had.

I am glad you all all like my letter.  It felt good to get some of that off my chest.

[georgiapeaches]

grainofsand,
I will probably read that letter everyday, it is so  powerful and so true! Thank you so much for posting it.

[patty]

I will save your poem and read it often.
Thank you for having the courage to put it all into words for us.  Patty
   

[kevinjj]

That is truly profound, capturing what a thousand broken and lonely hearts are feeling here. I am at a loss for words and only those of us who never wanted or chose to be here can relate to its pathos -we live it, we endure it, we suffer it. What you have written is eternal and carries down through the ages the lament of the grieved. I have never encountered anything so poignant.  Please seek a copyright on that and seek publication. Thank you for posting that.

[in2hens2]

That is incredible, it really moved me to tears.

[georgiapeaches]

I finally got my printer hooked up just so I could print your letter out, it had such an iumpact on me, it gets right to the point of how I feel, Thank you.