Author Topic: Information about the Main Board  (Read 33354 times)

laurenE

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Information about the Main Board
« on: February 12, 2008, 07:00:22 PM »
The Main  board is a place for those of us who  have lost a friend or loved one. It is a place for all of us  to gather , offering support to each other in our grief.   It is a place  where we are free to be ourselves or be anonymous.  It is our safe place to laugh,  cry,  vent,  express our anger at our situation,  be confused,  or simply share and  remember  the one who has died.   It is a place where we can offer support to others as well as ask for support in our own journey.

  Feel free to respond to posts already started or you can start your own.  Don't forget to go to the introduction board and post a brief introduction about yourself and  how your friend or loved one  died.


meemaw

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Re: Information about the Main Board
« Reply #1 on: February 14, 2008, 06:04:34 PM »
Today is valentine's day! It is also my late husband's birthday. I took flowers out to his grave.  This is the second birthday he has been gone. I don't think this one was any easier than the first.  Yesterday was 22 months since he died. You will not believe what happen yesterday.  I babysit my grandchildren accross the street from where I live. I saw this car pull up in front of my house and this guy go up to my door.  I called to him and told where I was.  He was from one of the local funeral homes, his title was "Pre-needs councilor". He want ed to talk to me about preplaning my furneral. What they had available. I do not know why I did not ask why he stopped by my house.  After he left I got  to thinking maybe he found out I was turning 65 in March and going on medicare. My mail box has been filled with things trying to induce me to take out insurance or find out about medicare.  I told  him what that day and Valentine's Day meant to me. I was surprised that I didn't  lose it.  Guess I am making progress. Thank you all! P.S.  I bought a bottle of champane and drank a toast to my husband for nearly 45 years.    Meemaw

Hope

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Re: Information about the Main Board
« Reply #2 on: February 15, 2008, 02:57:03 AM »
Meemaw,
You're doing great in all of this!  Before I lost my mom my hubby & I were what I thought & called best friends but after I realized how much in my corner he really was.  I can't imagine how hard it must be to lost a spouse, a soulmate, a best friend.  It's all so sad.  I'm sorry that you lost your husband. 

By the way, how did the guy handle it when you talked to him about what Valentine's day meant to you?  (I hope you enjoyed your bittersweet champagne toast.)
Hope 

sweetpea

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Re: Information about the Main Board
« Reply #3 on: February 15, 2008, 05:44:52 AM »
Hello Meemaw,

 I too am sorry that you suffered the loss of your husband. I know that it was bitter sweet that yesterday was his birthday and Valentine's Day.

 It was so regretful you also hand to deal with the guy from the funeral home on the same day. I want you to let these words  comfort you.

THOSE WE HAVE LOVED SHINE ON. WE LOOK AT THE NIGHT SKY IN THE QUIET OF THE DARKNESS , AND THEY ARE NEVER FAR. THOSE WE HAVE LOVED AND CHERISHED, THOSE WHO HAVE CHANGED OUR LIVES IN SOME SMALL OR PROFOUND WAY, ARE CLOSER THAN WE KNOW.

 BECAUSE IT IS THEIR LIGHT THAT SHINES ON OUR WORLD. IT IS THE BRILLIANCE OF THEIR SOULS THAT MAKES OUR NIGHT SKY GLOW." 

Sweetpea
 Please take care
« Last Edit: February 15, 2008, 05:46:51 AM by sweetpea »

meemaw

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Re: Information about the Main Board
« Reply #4 on: February 15, 2008, 05:05:12 PM »
Hope, it turned out the  guy really was classy enough not to try to give me information after I told  him what those two days meant to me.  This is a four day weekend for so I get to do a few things. Mainly visit a friend and enjoy company other then the family i usually spent time with.  Today was really a nice change.           Thank you all!   Meemaw

casey

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Re: Information about the Main Board
« Reply #5 on: April 16, 2008, 06:10:12 PM »
My mom committed suicide this past December.  I've gone to a support group.  Some days are better than others.  But most of all I feel lost.  It just doesn't seem  real.

laurenE

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Re: Information about the Main Board
« Reply #6 on: June 26, 2008, 04:41:25 AM »
casey,

Im so very sorry for your moms suicide.   I hope you come back and talk to us here.     I hope the support group is helping you some.   Let us know how you are doing.

lauren

Lori47

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Re: Information about the Main Board
« Reply #7 on: July 22, 2008, 07:40:51 AM »
My name is Lori and my husband of 26 years died suddenly on June 8th of this year.  He was 51 and died of a heart attack.  He was perfectly healthy as far as we knew and took no medication for any health condition.  One minute he was there and the next gone.  Died instantly, nothing anyone could do.  My faith in God is strong and through much prayer I have been able to get through this.  But I am still struggling with the day to day living and missing him so much.  I was wondering how other people in similar situations deal with the lonliness and heart ache.

Thank you.

laurenE

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Re: Information about the Main Board
« Reply #8 on: July 22, 2008, 11:50:34 AM »
Lori,

Im so glad you found us here and hope that you will receive great encouragement from us.     

I am so sorry for your sudden loss.   


shhh65

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Re: Information about the Main Board
« Reply #9 on: July 29, 2008, 09:25:20 PM »
Lori,

My husband also died suddenly with no apparent health problems. He had been to his doctor just 11 days before I found him dead in our yard December 22nd. You asked how others are dealing with it. The first 5 months I cried mostly non-stop when I was home alone. Otherwise I kept pushing myself out the door to grief support group, bible study, volunteering in my daughter's classroom (she is a teacher) and out with old friends and new friends I've met in grief support group. I also post on another grief support website I found not long after he died. That first post was hard. I mostly typed and deleted without posting for the first couple of months.  I think it was theraputic anyway just to "write it out."  I am hanging on the the fact that my husband was having a wonderful day off work (he was to retire-just 6 days left to work). It was warm for a winter day and our granddaughters were coming for us to take them to the movies so that my daughter and her husband could finish their Christmas shopping. We had so much to look forward to after 42 years of marriage. I feel cheated out of the early retirement plans we had made but I know I will make it as there are so many others on this journey ahead of me and they are continuing to put one foot in front of the other. I admire your courage for finding and posting on this website so soon. I feel certain you will find comfort and support here.

God Bless You,
Sherry
Sherry

Psalms 34:18 The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

kevinjj

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Re: Information about the Main Board
« Reply #10 on: July 30, 2008, 09:10:30 AM »
Lonliness remains a huge issue with me. Im approaching 6 months since my wife died and the extreme, super-harsh emotions have eased after a couple of months. Grief group, counseling, calling people, just getting out of the house, attending events, book club, family events all help but I still go home to just me being there. Maybe the trick is in seeing that there are other lonely people out there too and many who are not going through grief as we are. I don't have many answers but I do know that simply writing out my thoughts and posting them here is of benefit to me. Keep posting and look for as many supports as you can find. I hate this journey alone but I don't have much choice in the matter.

ashleybarnhill

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Re: Information about the Main Board
« Reply #11 on: December 02, 2008, 07:27:36 PM »
I just signed in last night and I need to talk. My father passed away last Jan., he was 75, and had alzheimer's. Every night when I sleep I dream of him. He didnt know me the last few months of his life. I was his caretaker. When I dream he is alive and well, but when I speak to him he doesn't know me. Each night my heart is ripped out. I don't know how to move on. If I don't cry, I feel like I don't miss him enough. I feel guilty about not taking better care of him. Like I should've done a better job. My days are consumed with thoughts of him. I see him everywhere I look. I live in his home, at aleast for a few more weeks. I just found out that the bank is starting the paperwork to foreclose on the home. Now I have something else to mourn. I've lived here almost all of my life. Does what I'm feeling ever get any easier? Or is this how I'm going to feel forever?

katydid

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Re: Information about the Main Board
« Reply #12 on: February 25, 2009, 10:14:35 AM »
I cant seem to find where iI introduce myself help please
kathie sandoval
[email protected] [nofollow]

sevenofwands

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Re: Information about the Main Board
« Reply #13 on: February 25, 2009, 10:16:58 AM »
You are here, Kathie!

You will see four "lozenges" to the right at the top.  Click on "new topic" and tell us your story there.

Seven

Barb45

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Re: Information about the Main Board
« Reply #14 on: March 30, 2009, 09:55:18 AM »
Lonliness remains a huge issue with me. Im approaching 6 months since my wife died and the extreme, super-harsh emotions have eased after a couple of months. Grief group, counseling, calling people, just getting out of the house, attending events, book club, family events all help but I still go home to just me being there. Maybe the trick is in seeing that there are other lonely people out there too and many who are not going through grief as we are. I don't have many answers but I do know that simply writing out my thoughts and posting them here is of benefit to me. Keep posting and look for as many supports as you can find. I hate this journey alone but I don't have much choice in the matter.
[/quote

Kevin, I know how you feel. Its been 3 mts since I lost my husband. I get very upset when I see couples together, anywhere! Its easier somehow to keep to myself. After 44 yrs being married, nothing can hurt so much!!!

"Why did you have to go...."