Hi,
Next Monday, is Thanksgiving in Canada(where I live). Every Thanksgiving now, is tainted by one of the last memories of my mom. I think I must write this down, every year now, so I hope that some of your memories have failed, so it looks like I am writing this down for the first time.
My mother's health had been failing for some time, although her doctor had given the incorrect diagnosis of lactose intolerance, so we had no idea that her condition was as serious as it was. Every Thanksgiving, my family and mom and dad and brother, would get together and in the last few years, I had been the one to prepare the meals, as it had just got to be too much for my mom. As the day approached in 2004, my mom made no mention of Thanksgiving. Finally, I made mention of it to my mom, and she responded with what I thought was indifference. Later that night, she called me and told me that we could get together.
The next day, I prepared the meal and brought it over. My mom came out of her bedroom, attempted to eat the turkey dinner, and then said that she just didn't feel well. She returned to her room, and didn't come out again, that night.
This is the one memory, that if I could have had it to do all over again, I would ask for the chance to have realized how truly sick my mother was. Every year, this memory comes back to haunt me, and I realize how much I miss my mom. Every year, this memory brings the tears back again.
Thanks for listenning. It does get easier with time, but there are moments and times of the year, that the pain comes back to the forefront.