Author Topic: Homicide victims?  (Read 6272 times)

TaraTory

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Homicide victims?
« on: March 21, 2007, 06:43:38 PM »
Good Evening.
This is my first time to this site.  My only brother Tory was murdered on Dec. 12, 2006.  He was 30 yrs old.  Has anyone lost someone to homicide? 

I am having such a hard time with this loss.  I cry all the time and I just want this to all be a horrible dream.  I keep thinking that in a few weeks everything will be ok again; then i realize the truth and that things will never be ok again.  I hate that I never got to say goodbye.  I hate that he was just at work, closing within the next half hour when this gunman came in and ruined my life forever. 

I guess I'm babbling...sorry...

--Tara

Sad Eyes

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Re: Homicide victims?
« Reply #1 on: March 22, 2007, 12:39:04 PM »
Tara,

My heart goes out to you, I too have lost a brother to murder.  Murder is a loss that is beyond most peoples comprehension and unless you have experienced it you can't even begin to imagine the pain, sorrow and anger that follows.  Not getting to say goodbye only adds to the anguish.  Sudden and tragic deaths (in my opinion) are much harder to deal with.  It's understandable that you are having a hard time dealing with this type of loss. My advice, is to try to find some way to release everything that you are holding inside. I held everything inside for way too long and tried to be strong.  I finally gave in about a year later and went to counseling.  That helped me find some coping skills that have really helped me through the really tough times. 

  Do they know who committed the crime?  Have you been through any on the
legal process yet?   Sorry to ask so many questions, but I know what you are dealing with and how hard it is.  If you need to vent or to talk to someone who understands,  I'm just a message away.   Again, I'm so sorry for that you have lost your brother in such a tragic way!!  Take Care!

TaraTory

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Re: Homicide victims?
« Reply #2 on: March 22, 2007, 06:04:03 PM »
  Do they know who committed the crime?  Have you been through any on the
legal process yet?   Sorry to ask so many questions, but I know what you are dealing with and how hard it is.  If you need to vent or to talk to someone who understands,  I'm just a message away.   Again, I'm so sorry for that you have lost your brother in such a tragic way!!  Take Care!

Yes they know who committed the crime.  He killed himself after he killed my brother and the boucner that night.  We won't have to go through a trial or anything like that but sometimes I wish we had to because I am so angry that I feel I need to vent my anger somewhere.  I would love to yell and scream at the guy who did it or even his mother, because I can't yell at him so she's the next bet person on my list. 

I just keep thinking..."why Tory?"  Things like this don't happen to people like him.  I still can't believe it's true.  I am i counseling and who knows if it will do anything or not.  She says I'm doing well for it just happening three months ago.  I just feel like i'm going crazy...I want him back so badly!  How do i go through the rest of my life without him???

--Tara

Sad Eyes

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Re: Homicide victims?
« Reply #3 on: March 23, 2007, 06:38:12 AM »
Tara,

I hope that you will be able to find a way to release some of your anger.  Even though 7 years has passed since my brother was murdered, I have so much anger inside of me.  Murder not only takes the life of the victim, but also changes everything about life for the survivors.  What I wouldn't give to have my life back like it was before the murder took place.  I'm glad that you won't have to endure the legal process, that is a very painful thing to go through.  I wish that I could say or do something that would help you in your struggle. I hope that it helps you to know that you can come here to vent anytime.  Take care!

rachel

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Re: Homicide victims?
« Reply #4 on: April 30, 2007, 06:44:53 PM »
I'm so sorry! When my Grandma died I had a very very hard time and I still do. What helps me is Revelation21:4- God will wipe out every tear from their eyes, and death will be no more neither mourning outcry nor PAIN be anymore.
                        Rachel