Author Topic: Is it wrong?  (Read 8994 times)

CRCmom

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Re: Is it wrong?
« Reply #15 on: March 06, 2007, 03:05:40 PM »
Wrong?

Who has the right to say what is right or wrong anyway - except you!!!!!!  Whatever you need to do to deal with this tremendous loss is yours to do!!!!

LOVE AND GRACE ON THE JOURNEY,
PAULA


laurasmom

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Re: Is it wrong?
« Reply #16 on: March 06, 2007, 06:54:05 PM »
Nothing is wrong if it helps us feel closer to our child. Tomorrow will be 3 years and 9 months since Laura was killed.  Her room is the same as the day she walked out of it, with the exception that she had not made her bed that day, and I made her bed a few days later.  But I did not change or wash her sheets.  I still go in there and lie on her bed and hold her pillow.  I did not get her clothes that she was wearing that day back either, they were ruined when they were trying to resusitate her.  The nurse at the hospital did give me her earrings and a note that she had in her pocket, a poem written to her from her boyfriend.  Her purse was never recovered, we don't know if it was crushed into the car, or picked up by someone at the collision scene.  She had a pair of favorite shorts, with "ANGEL" printed across the back of them.  I sleep with them in my pillowcase every night.  She also liked fresh flowers, I used to buy her bouquets to keep in her room.  Now I take fresh flowers to her grave every week, winter, summer, fall, spring, snow, rain, whatever, she gets fresh flowers every week.  Sometimes I will see something that I know she would like, and I get it to put on her grave, or in her room, or in the memory garden I planted for her.  I have been told that I should not still be going to the cemetary so much, that it's time to pack up her things, etc.  I just don't pay attention.  The ones who say this to me have never lost a child.  I love her and miss her very, very much, as all of you do your children, and I will do anything to keep her close to me.  I don't care what anyone else thinks.
Lois, Laura's Mom

quint906

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Re: Is it wrong?
« Reply #17 on: March 07, 2007, 07:20:04 AM »
Laura.

The other day, a friend of my husband to him "you have to move on".  When Gary told me this, I exploded.  There will never be a moving on,  only a moving forward with the acceptance of this pain.  I've heard how people speak before they think, and believe me, this "friend" is one of them.  Unless they've been in our shoes, they don't know what they're talking about.  All I know is if someone says that to me, watch out.  Our children existed and still exist in our hearts forever.

Jo

leslie

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Re: Is it wrong?
« Reply #18 on: March 07, 2007, 01:14:57 PM »
It's been nearly 7 years since Jarek died. We too had to move shortly after he died. I have a box of stuff that was his. His watch still goes off from time to time. I believe that anything that makes us feel better/closer or whatever to our children is not wrong.

Much love,

Leslie