Author Topic: So very very sad  (Read 5918 times)

CRCmom

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So very very sad
« on: January 26, 2007, 08:17:17 PM »
 Just feeling so very very sad that Christian is not here.  Can't believe it will be two years.  Taken so quickly.  The last look is forever branded in my mind.  He looked so scared.  I just keep replaying the tape and it haunts me.  I miss my son so much.  Life will just never be the same.  I don't want to always be sad, but it is so very hard not to.  It's that shaking my head syndrome.  Can't believe he's gone.    I just want him back.  When will the memories make me smile? 
I love you so much my precious son.  I adore you and miss you with every breath I take.
LOVE AND GRACE ON THE JOURNEY,
PAULA


faye

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Re: So very very sad
« Reply #1 on: January 26, 2007, 08:19:35 PM »
I understand and feel your pain.  I miss my son so darn much.  Holding you close to my heart.

Dottie (Tammie's Mom)

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Re: So very very sad
« Reply #2 on: January 27, 2007, 07:36:05 AM »

I understand, I do the samething walk arond still in disbelief then when I do believe I can't stand the pain.

No parent should ever have to face the death of a child. NO PARENT:::

Dottie Tammie's Mom

Donnys Dad

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Re: So very very sad
« Reply #3 on: January 27, 2007, 08:17:15 AM »
Yes, so very sad, I feel your pain.  "When will the memories make me smile"?  I ask that all the time, right now they mostly bring tears.  I also walk around shaking my head in disbelief.  How can this be real????

Thinking of you and Christian
I Miss You So Much Buddy, My Best Friend, My Tiger

Don, Donny's Proud Dad


sykeller (Ray's mom)

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Re: So very very sad
« Reply #4 on: January 27, 2007, 08:47:25 AM »
Paula,

Thinking of you and sweet Christian.  I feel your pain.

Wishing you peace,

Sy


Rebecca

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Re: So very very sad
« Reply #5 on: January 27, 2007, 11:15:52 AM »
me2 me2 me2.  Sad, sad, sad..we are coming up to two years as well and the disbelief is more real than two years ago.  I was just in the supermarket and Jason loved Green Goddess Dressing.  We all hated it but I always kept it in the frig for him.  I was so tempted to buy it again, but I didn't...Everything just feels so darn low.  I look at myself and have no clue, who am I.  I join the rest of you...
Rebecca Jason's Mom

Sharon - Dawn's Mom

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Re: So very very sad
« Reply #6 on: January 27, 2007, 07:53:35 PM »
Dea Paula,
I'm holding you and Christian in my heart.  It's way to sad for all of us.  I too shake my head in disbelief and wonder when the memory's will ever make me smile again instead of bringing on the tears.  Oh, how I know you miss your Christian...as I know how I miss my Dawn.  It hurts too much.  I'm having a hard time these days too...when will I feel joy again?  Maybe never.
Love and Hugs,
Sharon - Dawn's Mom Forever

Johns Mom

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Re: So very very sad
« Reply #7 on: January 28, 2007, 05:01:30 PM »
(((Paula))) my John will be gone 7 years in May and I still suffer from the "shaking head syndrome"  I think I always will!  Thinking of you and your precious Christian..Pat..John's Mom

Debh

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Re: So very very sad
« Reply #8 on: January 28, 2007, 11:21:50 PM »
Thinking of you. Sad it all is, and so very wrong, take care of you .

Love
Deb

Karen Paul

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Re: So very very sad
« Reply #9 on: January 29, 2007, 07:40:41 AM »
Paula - Thinking of you and Christian. Hope you feel him close by you. I'm so sorry you have these memories to deal with, but I honestly believe all the children are filled with peace now and they are in a place where the words of this earth (pain, fear, etc.) have no meaning.. they are beyond all of that... I hope I'm not being bold in saying this, it is just my feeling... sending you love and hugs, Karen

Don - Love your new tattoo! That is a beautiful tribute to Donny!

luv Karen

Johanna

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Re: So very very sad
« Reply #10 on: January 29, 2007, 07:01:14 PM »
I'm so sorry for what you are going through right now Paula.  It's awful that we can't go anywhere or do anything that doesn't have some kind of memory of our children attached.  Not even a grocery store - I do feel your pain for it mirrors my own.

This is the first time I have heard the term "shaking head syndrome", but it's nice to have that diagnosis... and that I'm not the only one.  I still find myself sighing to catch my breath because just when I think the elephant sitting on my chest has lost a little bit of weight... he eats 150 pounds of pizza or something.

Take care Paula.  Hoping today was a little better for you and wishing you strength and comfort as Christian's angel date draws close.

Love and hugs,
Johanna, Micheal's mom


Who, then, can so softly bind up the wound of another as he,
who has felt the same wound himself?
Thomas Jefferson