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Messages - Brenda(Jessica's Mom)

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1
Child Loss / Re: Been a long time since I posted
« on: June 21, 2011, 08:08:46 AM »
Thanks guys, your words express how I feel better than i could describe myself!

2
Child Loss / Re: Been a long time since I posted
« on: June 20, 2011, 08:28:51 PM »
And by self absorbed people I meant ones in my personal life, not any of you.

3
Child Loss / Been a long time since I posted
« on: June 20, 2011, 08:14:07 PM »
Tomarrow marks 7 years since Jessica's accident, and Wed will mark 7 yrs since she died. Hoped to come back here for some comfort and understanding, its good to see all the familiar faces, all our beautiful kids, but not so good to see the bickering.
  That said, has anyone experienced other people expecting you to "get over it" by now. They forget the "dates" and seem surprised that you still get depressed around these days. Almost irritated.  I keep my feelings to myself all year except her angel date and birthday. Apperently I need to shut the heck up then too. So tired of self absorbed people.

4
Child Loss / Re: Feeling Totally Useless and a Burden
« on: March 14, 2010, 11:33:05 AM »
((Don)) June of 2004 changed me too. I can relate to you feeling useless. Many days I find myself muddling thru the day, attemtping to busy myself with mondane tasks and not caring about anything at ALL. Its like my brain has overloaded and went on auto pilot, and my heart is so heavy it is a burden to get out of bed. Ive been told that we all have a purpose here, I just have no idea what the heck my purpose is, other than to cook and clean. BUT, not all my days are like this, there is an occasional day when my heart feels a bit lighter, and I can find a small measurable light, so I keep plugging on. I try my hardest to remember that things could be worse. I look at the devestation in haiti, chile, etc, and try to be thankful I didnt lose more than I have. I guess thats all we CAN do, is try. Sending you hugs Don!

5
Child Loss / 22 yrs old!
« on: December 30, 2009, 09:09:55 PM »
I cannot fathom that she should be 22 tomarrow. It doesnt seem real, or possible. As the years go by it gets "easier" to cope, but never will go away. Ill never forget you my sweet firstborn, my angel.

6
Child Loss / Re: For All Others
« on: December 20, 2009, 10:38:22 AM »
Sending you hugs Rebecca!

7
Child Loss / Re: The death of my only son, Dominic, age 7.
« on: December 20, 2009, 10:37:13 AM »
I am so very very sorry for your loss. I too felt the longing to die in those early stages of this terrible grief. You are not alone. Again, I am so sorry, and pls know we are all here when you need us to listen and understand. Brenda

8
Child Loss / Re: New Here, Not new to the worse thing that can happen
« on: November 11, 2009, 11:15:10 AM »
To both Peggy and Sabrina, I am so sorry for you losses.  You came to a healing place here, sending much love. Brenda

9
Child Loss / Re: Wondering About
« on: July 12, 2009, 08:54:40 PM »
I feel like SueH does...it gets hard after awhile, and sometimes it is just too painful to relive the early days of this grief. I hope everyone understands. I do come here almost every day and check in on everyone though.

10
Child Loss / Re: My beautiful daughter is gone
« on: July 11, 2009, 09:00:29 PM »
Donna I am so sorry about your daughter, and husband. Like someone else already said, this new grief is different than the older grief, and although I dont think "it will end" as you asked, but it will get easier to handle as time goes on. I think I can speak for all of us on this board that a hole is in our hearts, and we all have to learn how to live with that hole somehow. Glad you found our board, yes it REALLY helps to talk to other  parents like us. Keep posting and tell us more about your wonderful daughter when you are ready.  Love, Brenda

11
Child Loss / Re: My Father has died
« on: July 02, 2009, 06:02:29 AM »
(((Annie))) I am so very sorry.

12
Child Loss / Re: Matt T. left us 6 mos. ago.
« on: June 27, 2009, 12:29:29 PM »
6 months is still very early in your journey. May you find peace in the love you shared with your son Matt. Take good care of yourself and remember we all are here is you need to talk.

13
Child Loss / Re: Happy Birthday to my Sweet Sarah
« on: June 26, 2009, 08:10:45 PM »
May you feel her love today and everyday!

14
Geez what is with June 2004? Alot of us have lost children this month 5 yrs ago. May you find peace on the 26th and everyday. And my your son keep blessing you with the great pics!

15
Child Loss / Re: Big sigh
« on: June 23, 2009, 09:56:10 AM »
Thanks to everyone for your kind responses, and especially to Don- you made me laugh with what you wrote about Donny! Jessica's boyfriend she left here on earth has every intention to join up with her when it is his time, so she had better be behaving! LOL  In all seriousness though, I really think because we all have connected with eachother here that our children have made it a point to meet with eachother in heaven. And knowing my Jessie, she has insisted on teaching them all to ride a horse!!!! I love you all, Brenda

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