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Messages - Doug1222

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Main / Re: Thinking of you all this holiday season
« on: January 02, 2018, 07:41:53 AM »
Merry Christmas to you, Terry!

Grief not related to deaths / Re: Is anyone ever on this web site
« on: April 25, 2017, 02:21:04 PM »
A lot more people read than post, Dawn. It's a very helpful group.

Sibling Loss / Re: Baseball...
« on: December 28, 2016, 11:06:34 AM »
I'm sure he's waiting for opening day to make another run at it.

Go Cards!
Thanks for saying hi.

Sibling Loss / Re: Merry Christmas & Happy Hanukkah
« on: December 28, 2016, 11:04:53 AM »
I wish the same for you, Terry. And for all of us, I wish peace.

Sibling Loss / Re: Jolene's Angel Date (Gail)
« on: November 03, 2016, 11:43:19 AM »
Hi, Gail!


Sibling Loss / Re: Steven Craig's Birthday
« on: October 18, 2016, 02:40:58 PM »
Thank you, Terry.

Sibling Loss / Re: Baseball...
« on: September 30, 2016, 12:41:17 PM »
Thanks, Terry.

Sibling Loss / Baseball...
« on: September 30, 2016, 05:54:08 AM »
Hi, everybody! I haven't been around a whole bunch because I'm actually doing pretty good. I was just sitting here a little sad and thought of you.

The end of baseball season always makes me sad. My brother was the biggest St. Louis Cardinal fan in the entire world. He was such a huge fan that a group of his friends (and teammates) came by his visitation just to put a signed baseball in his casket. That was one of the points that made my mom break down and cry. One of his best friends came by and asked her,"Is it ok if we put this in with Meat? We don't want him going away without it."

They called him "Meat".

She told him,"Make sure you guys sign the book." He said,"That's ok...he knows we were here."

Anyway, with the season winding down and the Cardinals fighting for a playoff spot, I got sad. I'm sitting here with a tear in my eye as I write this.

Baseball always makes me sad. My brother's birthday is in a couple weeks. On top of baseball, that makes this the saddest time of the year for me. He was 22 when he was killed. He would've been 44 this year. That means he's been gone longer than he was here.


There's a song by Cole Swindell (a country singer) that might be helpful to some people. It's helping me today just by bringing out emotions I buried. Here's a snippet.

"You should be here, standing with your arm around me here.
Cutting up, cracking a cold beer, saying cheers, hey y'all it's sure been a good year.
It's one of those moments, that's got your name written all over it.
And you know that if I had just one wish it'd be that you didn't have to miss this
You should be here."
~~Cole Swindell

Everybody take care. Now I can smile.

Parent Loss / Re: Recently Lost My Dad
« on: June 09, 2016, 08:53:15 AM »
You're in the right place. As you're comfortable, share with us. It helps. You're safe here. It's good that you found it so soon.

I lost my dad in an accident when he was 57 in 2000. I also lost my brother in an accident when he was 22 in 1995. I was a wreck when I came here, but talking here helps. I nearly had a breakdown and didn't even know why. I didn't end up here until 2012. I'd never dealt with the grief over losing them. Don't listen to people. They don't understand. You JUST lost your dad. When my dad died, I helped my mom for probably a year. They had two places...a farm down in my part of the state with horses and the house I grew up in about two hours away in town. They lived in town. My dad died very unexpectedly in February. I took care of the farm for months while she figured out what she was going to do. She ended up selling the house up there and moving down here in the fall. Don't listen to people.

Sorry to meet you this way, but I'm glad you found your way here.

Main / Re: Where is everyone from?
« on: March 04, 2016, 10:58:33 AM »
Seems I'm the only Canadian here... hope that's ok.... I'm in British Columbia

Oh, Canadians aren't allowed here.

Just teasing. Welcome. We actually have some other Canadians, but I haven't seen them in a while. I think Gail is Canadian. She pops in once in a while.

Parent Loss / Re: (((Thinking of you, Gail)))
« on: February 02, 2016, 01:04:09 PM »

Sibling Loss / Re: Lost my brother 11 days ago. I think Im a medium.
« on: December 17, 2015, 12:54:41 PM »
Hi, Marcela. I also lost my brother in 1995. He was 22 and I was 27. We were extremely close. He was in the Army at the time. Exactly what happened is complicated, but he was killed in an auto accident on his way home from Fort Bragg, NC.

I'm very sorry we have to meet this way, but you're in the right place. There are wonderful people here who will help in any way we can.

It's safe to talk here.

It took me a very long time to work past my brother, but his death was compounded by losing my dad in 2000. Both were very sudden. I don't have any real advice except keep talking. Somebody here is always reading.

Child Loss / Re: Hello, I'm new here
« on: December 02, 2015, 10:18:33 AM »

I'm so sorry to meet you this way. I have never lost a child, so I will leave talking about that to others who have. I have lost two siblings and my dad.

I just want to say...yes, you are normal.

Be kind to yourself and it sounds like you're doing fine to me. Feel free to talk here. It's a safe place.

Parent Loss / Re: Introductions
« on: November 03, 2015, 03:03:15 PM »
Hi, Jamie. I'm sorry we have to meet this way, but I just wanted to let you know you're in the right place. It's safe here.

I also lost my dad suddenly in an auto accident. I went back to work two days after the funeral. Don't're not strange. 

I'm very sorry you're going through this.

Sibling Loss / Re: Jolene's Angel Date
« on: October 20, 2015, 02:26:31 PM »

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