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Messages - Luvinmike

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Sibling Loss / Re: Loss of brother
« on: April 29, 2010, 06:05:15 PM »
Sorry for your loss Deebee. Thinking of you.

Grief not related to deaths / Re: update to myself
« on: April 29, 2010, 06:03:03 PM »
Hi Angelicmom27;
I hope things will let up a little bit and soon. I am sorry for what you are going through. The only things I can think of are the Senior Services in town and if he is a veteran, those services. Be pushy, you need real help. I am thinking of you.

Grief not related to deaths / Re: I got the job!!
« on: April 19, 2010, 07:00:42 PM »
Hi Terry!

     I love it!  Thanks for asking, how are you? I am doing really great, I even went on an official overnight business trip. I took myself out to dinner. I cried when I spent this awful lonely night in the hotel, but next time I will relax and bring a book. I am glad to be doing new things.
How are you doing and what have you been up to?
Thanks again,

Main / Re: New here, missing my husband terribly.
« on: April 19, 2010, 06:57:05 PM »
Dear Nova, and Leo;

     I am so sorry for both of you, and all of us missing our spouses. I am having some times of peace now after two years, but they are often shattered by a vision of my husband, close to me. I miss him all the time.
     I am starting to feel like I can look forward to some things, and get my mind interested in work. The truth is I know I will always miss him, and I have to structure my life around this pain. I will say exercise is my best advice, keep moving, it helps me think positively.
     I am sorry for your losses and I hope you will continue to visit this site to read and post. We are glad to have you here, and so sorry for the reason you are here. Thinking of you both.

Main / Thinking of you Georgia
« on: April 19, 2010, 06:51:14 PM »
I know it is near to Johnny's angel date, and I just wanted to send you a hug (((Georgia))). I always think of you, ((((Donna B.)))) and a few others whenever I come on here to read or post. My heart is with you in this.
Your friend,

Main / Re: All gone...
« on: April 19, 2010, 06:49:33 PM »
Hi Fireball;

I get angry too. Sorry. I hope you will entertain my idea, but if you don't I get it too.
      I would take a leave of absence for three weeks. It is long enough to get a little break, not long enough to wreck your career or job for the moment. I would use the family leave act and do it asap.
     Deep breathing... Be outside as much as possible, walking, running, looking up into the sky. Decide that this is your life, not anyone's but yours. And then realize that caring deeply for yourself can help a tiny bit. That is what I am doing. It is cliche or whatever, I really don't care- ya know.
 I simply wish you every bit of strength that I have to get through till the next day, when the nights can be so hard. I am so sorry for your losses, just plain sorry. Thinking of you fireball.

Main / Re: Intro
« on: April 19, 2010, 06:42:50 PM »
I am sorry about both your special partner and your loving daughter. It must be a shocking and confusing experience for you. My heart goes out to you and I agree with Terry, please let us know how you are. One little breath at a time.

Main / Re: I didn't want to be a widow but here I am...
« on: April 19, 2010, 06:39:39 PM »
 :'( I am sorry for your loss but I am glad you found this site. Please share with us as you can. Please read and visit often, I wish you strength.

Dear Haileyyy,

     I am sorry about your sister, truly sorry. I hope you will talk here and welcome to the site. I can imagine you have a broken heart. I understand wanting to talk to someone and I will tell you what helped me, follow your instincts for what is best for you.
I walked miles and often to church gardens, wearing sunglasses so I could cry. I got a therapist and searched out a grief support group. I kept walking and walking. Then i started running at a high school track next door to a church. I lost the forty pounds I gained in the first year.
I am feeling physically better but emotionally still really hard. (2 years since loss of my husband). I have a journal that I write how I feel and I read Emily Dickinson poetry and others, that is relaxing, I learned knitting and joined a group.
 Nothing fixes this, for me, but those are some of the things that help me get to the next day. Oh, and treat yourself well. Sending you strength and courage as you try to make sense of these changes. Thinking of you. Sorry for your loss.

Sibling Loss / Re: Tony's 1 year Angel Date
« on: April 17, 2010, 04:59:16 AM »
So good to read this browneyedgrl, I am so glad you have support. Grief is something we incorporate into ourselves, I think. It is nice to be aware when you feel okay, that is what I am working on now. Hugs to you.

Grief not related to deaths / Re: 6 year relationship ends : {
« on: April 17, 2010, 04:47:32 AM »
Dear Steveo;

     I am sorry for the pain of this big change in your relationship. I agree with your thinking about giving her space and see if she decides to come back. Trying to convince someone to love you right now seems like a recipe for disappointment.
You have to get your mind in a place ready for change, know matter what she does.
     It helps to have a confident view of yourself, stand up straight, get and keep healthy, and do what you need to do for yourself. That is what will make you most interesting to her and others. Then you are prepared for whatever comes your way.

Main / Re: All gone...
« on: April 16, 2010, 02:44:06 PM »
Dear fireball;
Yeah, you copied my quote and called it cliche', and that hurt me right back.
I have had multiple losses, and I guess I was just offerring you some friendship in this lonely grief- filled existence.

Main / Re: Lost my beloved
« on: April 11, 2010, 01:34:07 AM »
To everyone on this thread;

   I want to say sorry for your losses, may the memory of a shared smile carry you through this. I am writing to tell you what has helped me so far in this, two years almost since losing my husband. I have walked miles, I walk my dog and as Annette said, a companion.
     I eat healthy most of the time and write in a journal to my husband whenever I want. I listen to music that was special to us and I cry, I have written and read here for the whole time, I read poetry, gardening, cooking, I joined a womens' group and a book club. Our three kids are turning into adults and they seem to be well.
     I am wishing my husband would be here, but I am also feeling more conmfortable in the past month. I feel as though I have coached myself through this, positive thinking. Please share your loved ones with us and visit often. Sending strength...

Dear Lauren;
     I am sorry for the circumstances with your job. I hope over time it will become a good opportunity that offerred increased joy. You are thoughtful in reminding others, so I will remind you, to do something nice or special for yourself. It will be important to treat yourself well, and try to accept support. Thinking of you.

Main / Re: All gone...
« on: April 07, 2010, 03:57:08 PM »
Dear fireballkid;
     I am sorry for your losses, and the deep sorrow since last August. The most important thing is to remember that nothing was your fault, there was no controlling these experiences from your end.
Why do you have to live a lonely existence with many losses, and try to create an identity that is hopeful, I don't know- just remember there are others feeling this way too. It won't take it away or fix it, but I'm hoping it gives you a drop of strength in this grief. Sorry.

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