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Messages - Judy-Marc's mum

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Child Loss / Hopefully I got through
« on: February 06, 2008, 03:37:21 AM »
On my way to work this morning I was doing the speed limit on the highway and one of the young boys from our computer department went flying past me in his hotted up car.  It was like I was standing still.  When I got there he wasnt there. 
I saw him about an hour later and asked him what speed he was doing.  His reply "I dont know but pretty cool huh".  I told him that no it wasnt "cool" and that if I saw him doing that again, even if he thought that I was a bitch, I would call the police on him. 
I went on to explain that I had lost my 18yr old son (14th months ago on sunday) in a car accident due to speeding and that I wouldnt like any other family to go though what we all go through if I could help it.  I also told that I do rather like him and would like to have him around for a bit longer. 
Long story short I was crying whilst I told him about Marc so Iam the one who ended up getting a hug.
Hopefully the message got through about what can happen and that he now takes a bit more care on the roads.  Only time will tell.  He knows me well enough to know that I am not bluffing about the police.
Love to you all
Judy Marc's Mum

« on: February 02, 2008, 02:40:45 AM »
Shelly, that poem is just so beautiful.
Yes you said it yourself, YOU CANNOT BLAME YOURSELF for what happened to Landon.  You will make yourself ill if you do and your other children still need you so much.
I know it sounds terrible but I have made myself believe it in the last 13 1/2 months, but our boys time was up.  I have always believed that our lives are a pattern that is cut out for us on the day that we are born and we cannot change fate.  What a bitch it is. 
You are so right.  It is not fair.
Look after your self and your precious sons and daughter.
Will be thinking of you.

Child Loss / Sorry but very angry
« on: February 01, 2008, 09:26:55 AM »
Sorry if anyone got offended by my posts.  Just very angry at the moment. Missing Marc really bad at the moment.  Insomnia really sucks
Listening to Nickleback " Far Away"
Song for all of us.  It is beautiful

Child Loss / Re: not a physical death, but emotionally lost "daughter"
« on: February 01, 2008, 09:11:39 AM »
To BRL want to change places.  Will do it in a heartbeat.  AT least you know that your “child” is still alive, well  & happy”.  Still want to change?

Child Loss / Re: "died" vs "passed away"
« on: February 01, 2008, 08:42:13 AM »
I agree with Lois Laura’s mom Marc DIED.  My dad passed away due to cancer, my father in law passed away with cancer, but Marc and his cousin Phillip (who died 26 yrs ago) died.  They were both 2 young men who both made a mistake.  They didn’t pass away they DIED.  My daughter 27 (Who was only 8 mths old at the time) and my son Phillip (25), who was named after his cousin, know what they have lost.  They have lost a brother and a cousin who will always be remembered.
Go Marc & Phillip (Cousins, brothers, family in Arms) miss both of you boys.  Hope you have found each other.  Love you and miss you both.
You both DIED, you did not pass away
Love you both forever

Child Loss / I heard a beautiful story
« on: January 25, 2008, 03:17:03 PM »
Talking to Alisa (my grand daughter Makayla's mum) last night, she told me of a beautiful story that happened a couple of weeks ago.
Makayla was being naughty and was sent to her room, and as they had visitors Alisa or her stepfather Demis didn't go into her room to check her.  After the vistors had gone, she went in and found her asleep.  She woke her up and Makayla asked if anyone had come in and given her a kiss, upon hearing that no-one had been in her room she replied that yes somone had been in her room and that they had given her a kiss on the cheek.  :)
Alisa asked her if it was Uncle Marc to which she said that Uncle Marc is just in the photo that she has of him in her room.  (she knows that Marc is an angel and that he scares away any monsters that might try and hide under her bed) after try to explain to her about the whole mystery of life and death to her, which was to much for a 4 year old,(nearly 5 Nanny as I keep getting told)  Alisa gave up on it.
She said to me that she believes that it was Marc and that she is really happy to know that he is still around keeping an eye on them all.
I believe that was him just letting Makayla know that even if she was being naughty that she is still loved very much by everyone.
I wanted to post this as it is such a positive story for all of us :)

Child Loss / Re: New do you/do you introduce your child?
« on: January 24, 2008, 06:01:30 AM »
Hi Penny,
I know what you mean.  I am also in sales and totally get what you say about us all being talkers.  The first time that I was asked was actually by a customer.  I just replied that i have three.  A girl and 2 boys.  With staff members (especially new ones, as I went back to where I worked before) it was the truth.  I have 3 but only 2 are with us, that Marc, the youngest, had passed away in a car accident.  I also explained that if some days I seemed a little bit far away from it all, for them to just bear with me.  I have had nothing but postive results from using this method as everyone was very understanding. 
I hope that your first day goes well for you.
Will be thinking of you on Monday

Child Loss / Re: Made a web-page for my son Landon
« on: January 23, 2008, 05:15:31 AM »
Shelley, thank you so much for sharing Landon's website with us all.  Landon site is awesome.  I hope that Marc's is as good.  Thank you, thank you so much
I have taken by example and have now set one up for Marc.

Child Loss / Re: Marc
« on: January 05, 2008, 07:20:32 AM »
Thank you to all who replied.  this is almost as hard as the day that he died.  In fact it may be worse because multipule injuries just doesnt cut when you read the real thing.  A boy that lived his whole life flat out and on the go, I will finally say that I am glad he didnt survive.  He would of hated being confined to a bed and machines controlling his whole life.  Go kick that footy Marc and do it for all of us who love you

To all that have loved, just remember that you are loved.

Child Loss / Re: Happy Birthday, Thomas
« on: January 05, 2008, 07:03:17 AM »
Adele I hope you feel Thomas's breath on the wind.  I know he loves his mum.  Happy birthday beautiful boy

Child Loss / Re: The Winter Classic
« on: January 05, 2008, 06:59:07 AM »
Josh was there.  He saw every play in the game.
I fully beleive that.

Child Loss / Re: 2 years today
« on: January 03, 2008, 05:29:56 AM »
I was picking my my daughter up from work one day and as we drove past the the place that all the trucks  stop here in Darwin, i said there  is my car.  It was on the back of a truck being transorted down to Adelaide.  Danielle said to me.  Not your car mum, but when we got said yes it was was your car. (Marc died in my car) (something I NEVER  wanted to see)
I really dont know what to say here other than the fact that I can understand the pain that you are feeling now.  You must be a very strong and good person.
I dont know if I could handle dealing with what you went through.

Child Loss / Re: Danielle Marie's Birthday (13)
« on: January 03, 2008, 05:11:33 AM »
Happy birthday Danielle.  Hope you meet my Marc as he can give you a kiss and a hug for all of here on this forum.
Love from all of us.
Max, Judy, Danielle & Phlllip

Child Loss / Marc
« on: January 03, 2008, 05:06:25 AM »
It’s finely taken over 12 months now to get the final coroners final verdict.  Got it today.  Marc died with what Christopher Reeves had.  (I am so glad that he didn’t survive.) (He would of hated it, )Along with a lot of other injuries associated with an MVA.
His whole body was destroyed. He wanted to be an organ donor
I lost the plot
I read about the many injuries that he had
It breaks my heart to finally realize that Marc made the biggest mistake of his life.  He knew that he wasn’t a great driver and that he many mistakes.
I am sitting here sobbing my heart out and knowing what he did was great mistake.
AT least I KNOW that he didn’t have any drugs in his system (he was antidrugs)
I am the father of Marc Aidan Nuyens and miss him every day. Driving to and from work  with the radio on I think of him every day. I had a beautiful boy that died at 18 years  and I wish I can see him for one last time. I am 50 yrs old and I wish I could trade places so my son can be here today. I know it is not possible but believe that if there is a superior being that things will work out in the end . Love you son you are always in my heart. Love Dad.

This is the first time that my husband has been able to put into words that he feels.
Love to you all. Thinking of all our lost children.  We know that one day we will meet again
Judy & Max ( Marc’s Mum & Dad)

Child Loss / Re: A Special Christmas Greeting from John (Danielle's daddy)
« on: December 25, 2007, 06:39:46 AM »
John thank you you for your message.  I havent said it before but you are one off the main strengths that have kept me going with your words and poems.  Thank you with all my heart.
Best wishes to you and your family.
From one Danielle Marie (my daughter) to another and her family, wishing you all the best.

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