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Messages - Won_by_One

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Main / Re: Momentary lapses of reality
« on: July 22, 2008, 09:14:29 AM »
Thank you for your replies. Reading your experiences is heart wrenching but it really helps somehow, even though I wish you weren't hurting so. Thank you for talking to me and sharing with me.

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Main / Momentary lapses of reality
« on: July 21, 2008, 10:26:15 AM »
At the risk of sounding like I've lost it completely....

Since my brother died 2 years ago last February, I've had dreams of him regularly. They're brief and more often than not, feel like a visit or message. 14 days before my sister died 4 months ago I had a dream of him and her and I. I haven't had a dream of him since. And only one of her and that was right after.

Here's where the lapses come in. When I talk to another of my brothers I keep finding myself wanting to ask him if he's heard from them because I haven't heard from them in 4 months now and that's just no like him--our brother. It's so fast and fleeting I, thankfully, catch myself before it comes out of my mouth but as soon as I realize what I almost said I just well up with this incredible, indescribable pain and I want to break down and would if it weren't for the fact I was talking to a family member at the time. How does one deal with such things? I just don't know.  :'(

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Sibling Loss / Re: A TRIBUTE FOR EVERYONE
« on: July 19, 2008, 10:12:50 AM »
This is a great idea. I did the same for my brother and sister. It's very therapeutic. I still have days like today where I don't know how to cope but my myspace is my place to go visit them, so to speak, as they're buried in another state.

Thank you for sharing your slide show. It was very sweet. I'm so very sorry for your loss. If you'd like to see mine, it's not quite as good as yours but I'm at http://www.myspace.com/s_lamoureaux  I might go use the same program you used--at least give it a try. Thank you.


ETA: looks like we used the same program but for some reason your format looks better. Not sure how you did that but I like it. I also updated mine but sometimes all the pics show and sometimes only a few.

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Main / Re: New to the community
« on: July 19, 2008, 10:06:35 AM »
Hi, Richardson. I can relate to your situation. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time. I know it's hard, whether or not children are involved.

I was a wife and stay-at-home mom for 19 years. We divorced when our youngest was age 13. It felt like a death to me and I took it very hard but I quickly enrolled in a vocational school for medical assisting. The next year, after I graduated, I enrolled in another for medical assisting clinical and front office so I was preoccupied--mentally and physically--most of the time, with either school or studies. It boosted my confidence and got me a high paying job. It didn't change my situation with my husband, but it got me on the right track.

Maybe, if you're already in a career,  you could find a worthy cause to devote some time to. It seems like helping others in some way, if only an hour a day, is always spirit-lifting and just changes your whole outlook on life in general. I wish you luck and God speed you healing.

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Sibling Loss / 2 siblings gone in 2 years
« on: July 19, 2008, 09:50:39 AM »
I lost my brother, age 47, in Feb '06 and just when I was getting to the point where I could think of my brother and smile, I lost my sister this past March, also age 47. I'm not dealing with it well. I don't look like myself anymore, I've aged at least 10 years, maybe 15, and I don't want to burden family and friends who clearly don't know how to handle anyone else's grief as they're grieving too. When I talk to them they seem to try to change the subject. I respect that as their way of dealing with it. They're hurting too. I don't know what to do with  myself anymore. I miss them so much it hurts.

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