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Messages - LisaM

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Sibling Loss / Re: First anniversary
« on: May 29, 2007, 01:43:41 PM »
Thank you so much for your words of encouragement! I guess what bothers me the most that I can't get out of my mind is finding him that way.  That is a sight I will never forget.  For almost a whole year I have not cared about anything.  Finances went really crazy and bill collectors do not really care about what your situation is.  I have slowly started in the past couple of months getting my situation back on track.  I really dreaded this day for about a month now.  I try not to listen to the people at work but the words still hurt when they say things like that.  It is really only one person in particular at my job that says those things. 

I will also be thinking of you.  It does help to be around people and doing things that wil make you feel better about coping with your loss.  You have to cope with it your way and no one elses.

Lisa M

Sibling Loss / I will always remember Bobby
« on: May 29, 2007, 11:25:01 AM »
The angels are taking care of my brother.

Sibling Loss / Re: Putting the pieces together again
« on: May 29, 2007, 11:21:56 AM »
Hi Jazzgirl,

I am going through a similar situation that my brother commited suicide and this is the first anniversary.  It has been exactly a year.  He has never been married and there are no children.  I will think about you in my prayers.

Sibling Loss / First anniversary
« on: May 29, 2007, 11:13:07 AM »
Today is the first anniversary of my brother's death.  He committed suicide by shooting himself in the heart.  I could not even bring myself to go to work today.  He was  not married and besides his critizing mother until the end, I am the only one that he had to talk with.  I never saw it coming and the guilt is there everyday.  Some are better than others.  The hardest part is that no one I talk with especially at work, does not understand why I still grieve.  Not sure how to make them understand.  I miss him very much.  I lost another brother to a massive coronary a year and a half before.  I think that hit him pretty hard which was another contributor to his depression.  I still have questions.  I have one brother left and our mother is now in a nursing home.  I can't even bring myself to go visit her.  I blame her for my brother's suicide.  She was very hateful to me and him and could never say anything nice!!  I am not exaggerating!  I know that she is the only mother that I willl ever have, but, I still can't bring myself to forgive her for his death.  My heart goes out to everyone that has had a loss.

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