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Topics - rolandsdaugter

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    ??? I am so devestated. I am not sure I can go forward in this life as I know it. It will be my shame and guilt that takes me out. I brought so much turmoil upon myself, and was miserable. I made my Moms (stepmoms and Dads) life a living hell, and I become estranged with my family...only with myself to thank. I believe I broke my Dads heart. He said everytime the phone rang he prayed it was me. I was loney, I was using, I was the living dead.
      And then two years ago my life halted. My Mom and Dad are back in my life. I am clean and sober. By the grace of God there was my Dad and Mom to help and support me in every way, financially, emotionally, phsically and every other way. They made sure I got the best medical care, dental work, support through drug court, you name it, they did it. I say Mom because she has truly been a Mom to me...she has loved me and supported me through my trial and tribulations. My Dad contantly told me how much he loved Mom...I could see it, 24/7. I have now had a chance to see the woman my Mom really is. So much grace, love and dignity.it has been an incredible lesson. I don't deserve her love, and now I wonder was Mom trying to accomidate my Dad? Does it matter? Does she love me? I am in their home....Moms home. It is time to go soon, I can feel it, I have to go but I am not quite ready.
Please pray for me. I thank God I was able to spend SO much time with my Dad. My heart is broken, twice really, because I believe I might have lost my Mom along the way.  Never take your parents for granted. Thank you for taking the time to read my post, all feed back is welcome!! Joyce
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