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Messages - Mandy

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Spouse, Partner Loss / Re: Introductions thread
« on: May 17, 2011, 12:47:04 PM »
Thank you so much for your very kind welcome, Terry. I was in a particularly black place that night and your warm words of understanding meant a great deal. I am in England, happened on this site when looking up references to George Anderson (yes, I am considering a telephone session, although it would necessitate remortgaging my home... ok, not quite...). It was good to find somewhere where people can share their feelings and I hope it's ok for me to be here and interact with you all. It's weird. I have never felt this kind of alone, even though friends and family are about. I was walking around the supermarket tonight and it was so wrong. It's one of the last places we were together, and I could only feel - he should be here, he must be around the corner. Why are they here if he isn't? Why are the same things on the shelves? I'm sorry, I feel like I'm bleating on and feeling sorry for myself when you all have suffered at the very least as badly...

Spouse, Partner Loss / Introduction - Peter
« on: May 15, 2011, 09:44:41 AM »

Just an introduction. Haven't had chance to look into site enough to see whether site is mainly US based, but grief & loss is universal, obviously, so hope you won't mind me here.

I lost my dear partner, Pete, 5 weeks ago to lung cancer. We were together approx one year, and our relationship I feel has been so devalued by his family (not his friends, who really knew him) for that reason.

He had been in remission for about 3 years and he was convinced he had beaten it, but the vile thing came back in his brain and spine in January, and elsewhere later. They tried to treat it, but...

Frankly, the story is still too painful for me to recount right now. Particularly the last week when we were together 24 hrs in the hospital. And as everyone here has suffered, I shouldn't think you need me to. So hard is so many things, but... he and I were everything to each other, everything. We didn't write things down, we had no idea we needed to (we had no idea it would be so horribly quick, Pete thought he had at least months...)

I'm sorry. I'm making such a ridiculously bad job of this introduction. I miss him so much. And feel that his family, who clearly never really knew him, are trampling all over our relationship. I'm sorry, this is so disjointed, I know. I just had to make contact...

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