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Messages - MelissaCharliesMom

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1
Child Loss / Re: Hello to all
« on: September 01, 2010, 08:09:43 PM »
Brenda, Thats awesome. There is no roadside memorial for Charlie. NY doesnt do that and if you place one it is often removed....sad.
Thinking of you!!!!I will have to look for the book.

2
Child Loss / Re: TODAY IS (CANDI'S) BIRTHDAY
« on: September 01, 2010, 07:34:53 PM »
Happy belated Birthday to your Dear Candi.

3
Child Loss / Re: 12 Years Ago Today
« on: September 01, 2010, 07:33:51 PM »
Your post provides such inspiration to those of us who have been traveling this road for a shorter time than you and hopefully even to those who have just begun this horrible journey.
Sending strength and peace to you.

4
Child Loss / Re: Happy 25th Patrick!
« on: September 01, 2010, 07:27:14 PM »
Thinking of you.

5
Please know I think of you often. I dont write much anymore, but do read. I have no words to make it easier. Just know I care.
Sending strength and peace.

6
Child Loss / Re: Hello to all
« on: September 01, 2010, 06:54:18 PM »
Oh my dear...I found a website dedicated to all those white crosses. I know where I will be reading the rest of the night.
How I wish this was all so different for each and every one of us and our precious children.

7
Child Loss / Hello to all
« on: September 01, 2010, 06:34:32 PM »
We have been out of town for awhile and recently returned from a trip to Montana. It was a great trip and we enjoyed every second of it, hiking in Glacier and Yellowstone National Parks. Now for the dark cloud.
Montana has a program that consists of placing a white cross alongside the highways where there has been a fatality. South Dakota places diamond shaped signs with saying like ..."Xmarks the spot. Why die? Drive safely."
One morning enroute from Glacier to Yellowstone everyone in the truck was sleeping and I was driving. I swear to you there was a 20-30 mile seciton of road where there were white crosses every 2 miles. Five in a group, 2 in a group, 2 that said Mom and Dad, groups of 3 with teddy bears hanging off of them. I am not ashamed to tell you the farther I drove the worse I felt and I ended up pulling over and getting physically ill. I think the program is a real eye opener and shouldnt be stopped, but as a parent who lost a child in an MVA every cross I passed I couldnt help but wonder who that person was, who their families were, how they died.....it was a gutwrenching and yet very moving experience to say the least. That same day when we arrived in Yellowstone as we were opening the door to our cabin at the lodge, a dragonfly landed on the flowerplanter right next to us. I couldnt help but realize this was Charlies way of saying...its ok Mom.

Anyway I had to share this story with all of you. I have been contemplating it since I have been home. I wonder if anyone ever thought to write a book about all those white crosses and the people and lives they represent ????Sending strength and peace to each and every one of you.

8
Child Loss / Checking in
« on: July 29, 2010, 06:51:22 PM »
Well, we have passed the 6 year mark with very little fan fare and far too many tears. To all who have added me on FB thanks and feel free to IM me there. Hubby and I celebrate our 16th wedding Anniversary tomorrow....but the real celebration will be shortly after when we pack up the fam and head to MT until the end of August. We will be spending time in Glacier National Park and then moving on down for our 2nd visit to Yellowstone. I will check in on my FB when I can and we have WiFi. Thank the powers that be for family as we have Gpa and my favorite Aunt taking care of the farm while we are gone....I sure will miss my buddies (farm animals)
At the risk of repeating myself, I dont post much here anymore, but I am always on FB.
Wishing you all strength and peace.....

9
Child Loss / Re: Facebook
« on: July 24, 2010, 04:45:26 PM »
I am on FB too Melissa Gibbs - Sipley

10
It sounds like a great idea. If I was capable of flying it would be even better LOL! I drive everywhere. No flying for this girl. We are leaving for a trip to Glacier National Park and Yellowstone in mid August. So from Upstate NY to Montana. Anyone on the way?

11
Child Loss / Facebook Anyone?
« on: July 12, 2010, 07:21:48 PM »
Anyone else have a Facebook?Would love to add you.

12
Child Loss / Re: Where is everyone from?
« on: July 08, 2010, 09:08:20 PM »
Upstate NY. Waaaaayyyy Upstate.

13
Child Loss / Re: Landon's 3rd Angel date today
« on: June 02, 2010, 08:40:06 PM »
Dont post much anymore, but just had to say....I am thinking of you and your Lan-Man today....so sorry we have reason to be here!

14
Child Loss / Re: having a hard time
« on: April 12, 2010, 09:45:47 PM »
Vicki- I too struggle quite regularly with this "life" we know live. My children are young still , but I worry all the time what will happen when they leave home...my marriage has survived and is strong now, but in all honestly..I LIVE for my other children. I love my husband,  family and my friends, but all that love would have never been enough to save me had I not had my other precious children!I would have had NO reason to go on after losing Charlie!I know others here do it, but they are far stronger than I!!So your words touch me and while I am not at that point yet, I certainly understand.
Im not sure that I have any sound words of advice for you. We move forward each day as best we can and thats all we can do. I will never move on, never have a day where there isnt tears and wishing and hoping and having that cloud hanging over everything that we do.
We have somehow found a way to live, but are certainly not living as we did before and never will again.
I agree, the me who was me....left this earth the moment my son did. I am no longer that person. I have no friends left from that time (save 1 who is on of my best) My relationships with all 4 of my sisters have changed...it has all changed.
All I can offer is this...follow your heart, wherever it leads. Take a chance if you feel that nothing will make you happy except being closer to your kids and grandbabies. You have survived losing a child, you are strong enough to survive a move if it means being closer to them. We have made a large number of life altering decisions this past year or so. Never thought we would take some of the risks we have, but we now look at things so very differently....we figure if we can survive losing our son, we can get through some financial risks if it means being happier.
So Vicki, do whatever it is you can to try and ease your heart and mind. Notice I say ease, not mend or fix...we both know those things will never happen.
I am sorry you are struggling right now and hope for easier days ahead. Sending strength and peace.

15
Child Loss / Re: Stopping by
« on: April 08, 2010, 09:06:35 PM »
I LOVE pounding fence posts Wendy, LOVE IT!!!!!I certainly give you so very much credit. After Nursing school my intent was to go on for my midwifery...my passion was natural childbirth and I would preach it from the mountaintops to whomever would listen. The day my boy died...that dream died. I couldnt emotionally handle a career in the medical field. I knew that I could no longer seperate myself from situations that were tragic, I knew that I couldnt go into the breakroom, cry and scream into my shirt and then go back out and deal with a grieving family and act as if nothing happened!I am in awe of your strength and hope you realize what an asset you can be to those families who are walking this path, I wish I had been stronger!!Sending strength and peace.

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