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Messages - Soledad

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Spouse, Partner Loss / Re: Introductions thread
« on: April 10, 2017, 04:47:27 AM »

     I am so sorry to read of the loss of your dear wife. I hope you can find healing and peace at such a difficult time. There are times that you may feel her presence near. I pray you will find comfort in those times. Please take care of yourself. I hope you have a support system. Many prayers for you in your days ahead.


Spouse, Partner Loss / Re: Introductions thread
« on: January 19, 2017, 02:24:43 PM »
Hi Julie Marie,
     I am sorry for your loss. Please accept my deepest condolences. I know what you mean about the roller coaster. I hope for Peace for you. My husband died October 4th suddenly after a heart attack. He was a heart patient but was not sick that day except for a chest cold. He fly fished with my oldest Son, all day and after returning home in the late afternoon, said his back hurt. He went to lie down and by 7:40 he called to me. I called EMS, gave him CPR and he became conscious long enough to tell my son and I that he loved us. He said he knew he was dying. After leaving in the ambulance we never spoke to him again. He arrested in the ER before we arrived. They brought him back. On the third code I told them to stop. I am a nurse and I could see it was futile.
     I am doing a little better now. I have lots of support from family and friends and a prayer group.
I think it's good that you are with your Son. I'm sure that brings you comfort. Everyone is grieving, and so is your Son so I am sure it's difficult. These conversations here help. I'm hope you will come back and post again!


Spouse, Partner Loss / Re: 5 months gone & Why are familys so false
« on: December 17, 2016, 11:19:39 AM »
     People don't know how to deal with us, the grieving. Our feelings are intense and daily. It's not like other problems that resolve in a matter of days or weeks. I think people are truly at a great loss to imagine what could possibly help or what to say. I have no answers as to why people can't deal with our pain. I guess it might be too painful for them. Although, I agree, it's no excuse. Have you thought about a grief recovery group?

     My deepest sympathy on the loss of your dear wife. I lost my husband of 40 years in October. We were also together since our teen years. High School Sweethearts. It's really tough, I know.


Spouse, Partner Loss / Re: Introductions thread
« on: December 17, 2016, 11:10:52 AM »
Thank you, Terry. In my complicated grief, I have found that there are some articles but very few books that address the subject of dealing with infidelity in conjunction with grieving. I'm considering writing a book. My background is medical, but English was always a strong subject for me.

I found very little on this website regarding the subject as well.

I appreciate your reply. Looking forward to participating here as much as possible.


Spouse, Partner Loss / Re: Introductions thread
« on: December 12, 2016, 08:20:09 AM »
I am new here. I lost my spouse of 40 years in October. Mine is a complicated grief. I found out during the days of his wake and funeral that at the time of his passing, he was having an affair. I can not put into words how devastating this was and is. I am a Christian and God is holding me up, otherwise I would be in a million pieces. I Loved my husband and I am trying every day to forgive him for how he broke my heart. Death alone is terrible grief but the knowledge of his betrayal haunts my days, to a degree.

Some of my days are very difficult.

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