Crisis, Grief, and Healing => Main => Topic started by: Irene on October 19, 2014, 04:18:23 PM

Title: 10 years
Post by: Irene on October 19, 2014, 04:18:23 PM
Hello, On November 2, 2004 my mother suddenly passed away. I didn't know how I would ever be able to survive so much pain, but shortly after she died, I joined this board and the people on here helped me tremendously in dealing with my grief. With the 10th anniversary approaching, I find myself apprehensive. It's been almost 10 years and I've made it through this far, but with the milestone nearing, I find it feels forever and that forever feeling is really scary. I loved my mother dearly. She was one of the most important people in my life and there isn't a day that I don't think of her. I know that when my mom died, I would read the notes of others who had similarly lost loved ones quite awhile ago and I found myself wishing that I could have had that time passage as I felt it would have been easier than having such a fresh loss. To those of you with the recent passing of a loved one, I will assure you that it does get easier with time. We just never, ever forget that loved one. I wanted to thank those that helped me through with such a difficult time in my life. There is one in particular that I still have contact with. Bless all of you and thank you.
Title: Re: 10 years
Post by: Janka on October 19, 2014, 04:55:01 PM
Hi Irene!

Im sorry for your loss,too!

It doesnt matter whether now or long ago,because it always hurts.

Hugs from Janka
Title: Re: 10 years
Post by: Terry on October 19, 2014, 05:11:41 PM

(((((( Hi Irene ))))))

I understand feeling apprehensive with a milestone year approaching. Every year I've found is different and I believe that's because I am, myself ever changing. There are times when I really need to talk with my Dad, even though the last years of his life he wasn't the same. I don't know if you remember or not but he had Alzheimer's and we were very close. This time of the year is particularly difficult because the holidays are also fast approaching. His birthday is coming up then his angel date. Same with my Mom. She was a New Years Baby.

I know that I will never stop missing them. My Dad was very supportive when my children died as he loved them more than life itself. It's really hard when our greatest support is gone.

I understand, Irene. I'm so glad you stopped by as I always look forward to your posts. And, you're right that there isn't a day that goes by we don't think of them. But time does heal our hearts and we can remember them in happier times.

This board has been a lifeline for me, too over the years and I'm happy that I have been able to give back. And, so grateful that my heart has stayed open to love. :love9:

Love & Hugs to you,
Title: Re: 10 years
Post by: Irene on October 21, 2014, 07:15:17 PM
Thank you Terry and Janka,  I remember that when I first found this site, I would write on here and just cry while writing the messages and then cry more when I read the replies. It was hard to believe that people I had and have never met in person cared enough to help others in their most difficult time in their lives. I have profound gratitude for those here that dedicate their time in aiding people through their grief. I will make it through the next few weeks just as I've made it through the last 10 years, but never a day goes by that I don't miss my mother and that will be something I guess will be there for always. Thank you.
Title: Re: 10 years
Post by: Terry on October 24, 2014, 12:27:33 PM
We're always here for you, Irene. Stop by around the holidays and let us know how things are going for you. I love reading updates from everyone and reading how everyone has their own way of coping around this time of year. It's very helpful for all the members to read.

Much love to you, :love9:
Title: Re: 10 years
Post by: Janka on October 25, 2014, 06:05:06 PM
Dear Irene!

Im also here for you and hope you come back here around the holidays as its the hardest time of the year for me and others anyway.Let us know how you are and when you find a time,you can read my post and poems I write for my beloved man Jan from the bottom of my heart.

Nice to met you and wish you all the best in your life!

Hugs from Janka
Title: Re: 10 years
Post by: Irene on November 02, 2014, 06:20:10 AM
Thanks to you both,
   Janka, I will look up your previous posts regarding Jan. Today is the 10 year mark regarding my mother's passing. I had started a journal after she passed away and found it tremendously helpful as I did this website. Strangely, I have never found going to the cemetery comforting and I am not sure I will go there today. I've reread some of my journal entries that I made around the time of her passing and I wrote a new one and found that this as well as writing here, is what I needed to do. I never could have thought about landing in this spot 10 years after someone who I loved so much and was one of my closest friends had passed. Thanks to you both.