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Crisis, Grief, and Healing => Spouse, Partner Loss => Topic started by: DaveB on November 25, 2012, 10:42:09 AM

Title: Brief update
Post by: DaveB on November 25, 2012, 10:42:09 AM
The new job didn’t work out, so I’m back to the old routine, away from home a lot. Don’t care much, at least it makes the time pass quicker. I never took the photography class I signed up for, my work schedule kept me away too much. The only thing that gives me anything like enjoyment is being outdoors, exploring, walking, hiking, running. I try to do that every chance I get, although last week I was sick and didn’t get out too much. Haven’t been sick like that in many years.

Judy’s mother died last week, so we had a quiet Thanksgiving at her house with Judy’s sisters and their families. The last 3 years have been so hard on everyone. Three years ago Judy’s dad got sick and died, then Judy almost 2 years ago, and now her mother. Judy always tried to help her sisters care for their father and mother, but she was never able to help much due to her own illness. It’s been exhausting for everyone. Now maybe her sisters can get a little rest, but it’s not much comfort to them. They’ve lost both their parents and their baby sister in the last three years.

I don’t like being so downcast, but that’s the way it is. Maybe it’s the season and the approaching anniversary. There just isn’t much joy in my life, and no prospect for any in the future that I can see. But what can you say, I just keep plodding along.
Title: Re: Brief update
Post by: Terry on November 25, 2012, 12:56:12 PM

Hey Dave!

Sorry to hear the job situation didn't change as you hoped. Maybe down the road a ways it will. I'll be keeping positive thoughts for you.
I love the outdoors, too. It really does renew and refresh, doesn't it?

I'm so sorry to hear about Judy's Mom dying. You all have my heart. Her sister's have had so much loss in the last three years...Oh my...

And, there is nothing wrong with your post. You're sharing what's been going on in your life which is what we all do. Life certainly is not a bowl of cherries and that's just the way it is. And, I can tell you with great certainty that it's ALL about the holidays. It is for me. I can't even watch a commercial on TV without crying so now it just stays off.

You may not feel any joy right now with everything that's been going on, and that's understandable....but you brought me joy today because I think of you all the time and was so happy to see your post!!  :love4:

Know you are loved, Dave and keep plodding along and we'll keep plodding along 'with' you. One day, joy will come into your life and that will be a great day, because happiness will follow. You deserve to find happiness and it's all I want for you and I know it's going to happen!

Thanks for this update and please don't be a stranger, especially around the holidays. I've missed you.

Love,
Terry
Title: Re: Brief update
Post by: jbryant on November 26, 2012, 07:55:16 PM
(((((((((((((Dave)))))))))))))
Title: Re: Brief update
Post by: Jean D on November 26, 2012, 08:42:20 PM
(((((((((Dave)))))))))))

I too enjoy being outdoors. I am fortunate to be able to volunteer at a local Garden to get some of my outdoor time. Perhaps there may be one close by where you live that you could volunteer at...I know it provides me with much peace and many friendships.

Sorry to hear about Judy's mom, it is so difficult to deal with so much loss so close together.

May you feel peace and solace during this time of year.

Jean
Title: Re: Brief update
Post by: DaveB on November 26, 2012, 11:17:52 PM
Thanks everyone. It's hard trying to figure out what I want to do. I don't think I'd like volunteer work, I'm not too social and I can't commit to any kind of schedule anyway. I'm still just lost, kind of bouncing around.
Title: Re: Brief update
Post by: MyLou on November 27, 2012, 03:45:11 AM
((((((((( DAVE ))))))))


Hold onto to hope everyday I do. It will come to you what you want to do.


Sorry to hear about Judy's mom. 


Sending you, peace, hugs, love and hope

Always,

Lisa
Title: Re: Brief update
Post by: browneyedgirl on November 27, 2012, 10:54:48 AM
((((Dave))))

Very sorry for the loss of Judy's mother.
Title: Re: Brief update
Post by: sonya on November 30, 2012, 12:35:46 AM
(((((((((Dave)))))))))

I am so sorry about the loss of Judy's Mom.
You guys have had so much to deal with. No wonder you are feeling a little bouncy at the moment!
Walking is wonderful, it helps me so much to get out and about. I recently decided to sign up for a big 72km hike in Feb. Havent registered yet as its too early but having made the committment has given me a bit more purpose and drive and I like the structure of having to do the training walks...I wondered if you might find it useful to sign up for something like that too? Are there any intersting ones coming up in your area? Just a thought...

We are all thinking of you,
take good care,

Sonya