Dredding Wednesday Night

[Crushed]

 May 4th, 2 days before the 3rd month anniversery of the accident, my family and I are  attending a dinner where my honey will be honored. He was a tax man and this is his 25th season. I have known of and dredded this night since right after it happeded. I am very thankful that he is going to be honored and I am so afraid that I will break down and "loose it." We have to be in front of everyone to accept his award. My daughter is probably right when she says, go on and cry, eveyone knows how you 2 loved one another and they will cry too as they loved him also.  my other daughter says to stay seated and let them take care of it. I do not want to do anything to dishonor him or his memory. This is also the last time I will be with most of this group of people. It is big, the district. He knew most all of them. I don't. His office has been in touch with me all along.
This is going to be tough, but I wouldn't be anyplace else during this time. He was on his way to the office when the accident happened...... they have had a tough season also, having to tell and talk to all of his clients.
Please think of our family and maybe the good thoughts will give us strength. Thank you, Crushed

[Hope]

Crushed, I wanted to let you know that I'm thinking about you now & that you will be in my prayers on Wed especially, but everyday.  Whatever you decide to do or however it turns out, know that I'm in your corner.

I think it's fine to break down, if that happens.  Like you said, they all knew & loved your husband, too.  They'll understand either way.  I'd love to hear how it went, if you feel like sharing afterwards. 

Take care of yourself,
Hope

[PAT B]

My husband was an accountant as well.  It was amazing how everyone of his clients came to his funeral.

I had to put an ad in the paper telling them they could come for their records.  I had more clients coming than family and friends paying their respects.

I guess he is really missed by all.

Congrats on your honey's special night, and I hope you can enjoy yourself, BRING TISSUES! LOL

[Crushed]

Pat B. ,   I had the same experience at the memorial service. There were lot's of people I didn't know.  The minister even said he could feel more love than usual. I am still receiving sympathy cards from people he worked with years ago that have just found out.  one good thing about it is that you and I know how our husbands touched the community and we know they will be remembered. Crushed
 

[Crushed]

I just got home from the dinner and I made it through the evening and the tears did fall. Everyone that came up to us had such loving things to say about my husband and I was so touched and I loved hearing some of their memories and stories that I had never known about. There were alot of tears from alot of people. I received his service award and his office presented me a scrapbook they made of pictures and tributes from themselves and clients. What a lovely keepsake to have and for the grand children to see when they get older.
I almost made myself sick with dread, but it went well and we did have a good time. I am so glad that we went.  Thanks for all of the support. Crushed

[Lonnie]

Dear Crushed: How wonderful to hear that it went well, and that there were so many lovely tributes to your husband. Isn't it terrific to hear from people who knew your husband, but you might not have known? I remember at our visitation for my dad, a man came up and shook my hand and said he was my dad's barber. That was so neat because I know how close we get to our hairdressers. It does make you feel so good to hear what an effect your loved one's life had on others. It makes you even love and appreciate them more (if that is possible). Well, I'm proud of you and so glad that you went and let the tears fall. Everyone understands that it is just another expression of your great love for him. God bless and I hope you sleep well, Lonnie

[Crushed]

Thank you Lonnie, for your kind words.  Crushed

[Hope]

Crushed, I'm so glad that the other night went so well for you & that you had so much support there!  That scrapbook is such a nice keepsake.  How special that they cared enought to do that.  I just wanted to check in w/you & see how you're doing at this difficult time.  Three months was a tough day for me.  Would love to hear from you, if you feel up to it.  I hope you feel peace & love today-I'm thinking of you.  Take care,  Hope

[Crushed]

Hope, thank you for asking. I am not at peace today. The anxiety is terrible and my stomach is rolling.  I have to accept this and deal with it. it's 2 steps forwand and 3 steps back. My basement is all wet again after drying out and I am working to get the problem sloved. it might rain all week, so I may as well accept that also.
I went to brunch this morning with some friends, as I knew today would be rough. I was fine as long as I was out, but not now that I am at home.  I will work through these feelings. Thanks for listening. Crushed

[Lonnie]

Crushed: I am SO sorry to hear that your basement is wet AGAIN after all you've gone through to dry it out!!! Can this be fixed or will it always be a problem? I know it must get beyond frustrating to have to keep dealing with this. House problems and repairs are so draining, aren't they? We are putting siding on our house right now, and I feel like I LIVE with the workers. So much hammering and such! Day after Day! But it has to be done, and then to the inside repairs. I hope this basement thing can be fixed for you! Many hugs and Prayers-Lonnie

[Hope]

Crushed, I'm so sorry that you're hurting today.  I wish that I knew just what to say to make things better.  Sometimes words aren't enough.  I'm sending you a big hug right now!  I hope that you find comfort in your memories of your life with your dear husband & peace in your faith.  Take care of yourself.    Hope