Hi Brwneyegirl,
I'm sorry I just noticed that you left me a message. That was so sweet of you to check on me. Please know I wasn't ignoring you I just happened to click in my post. I seen that you wrote this weeks ago.
I posted on the Main Board. Tuesday was 4 months. It's so hard everyday I don't know how to get through this . I know it takes time and all I want is Lou back my old life back. I'm sure we all feel this it's just not fair.
This is what I had wrote on the Main Board when it was 3 1/2 months.
Thank you again.......
(((((((((((((((((((((((((( Brwyeyegrl)))))))))))))))))))))
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Hi,
It's been 3 1/2 months since I lost my fiancee' Lou. I cry all the time and some times I just sob and it feels like I can't get control.
I miss him every second, minute , hour of everyday.
I still feel so alone in this big world. I wonder why God thinks I can handle the loss of Lou. I am not strong enough. Everyday when I wake up I hope my nightmare goes away and he's back.
I look all around hoping to see him. I know this sounds silly but I said to my friend I just want to drive to Heaven and tell God I need Lou back. That you had him long enough.
I really truly don't ever see getting through this. I know it's still raw but the pain in my heart hurts so bad and I feel so emptied.
Our birthdays are approching in April. My birthday is April 6th and Lou's is the 7th. We always celebrated our birthday's together. It was important to both of us. I always bought us a cake and would tell Lou you are never to old for a birthday cake. For Lou's birthday I am going to the cemetery. Never thought I would be spending his birthday there. I am going to get ballons and a small cake or cup cakes.
Thank you for listening ......