Author Topic: It hasn't gotten easier  (Read 3138 times)

HeartbrokeninGA

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It hasn't gotten easier
« on: February 08, 2011, 07:46:41 PM »
Hello everyone.  I lost the love of my life a little more than a year ago to colon cancer.  She was only 52 years old.  As father to three adult children, I have tried to be the rock.  I suffered a quad bypass four months ago, and my rock is crumbling.  I don't have my compass to guide me now.  It is hard to deal with the loss of my wife as well as the loss of my health.  I am not looking for sympathy, but need a place to express my sorrow and my fears....  And maybe a place to yell. 

SarahW

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Re: It hasn't gotten easier
« Reply #1 on: February 08, 2011, 08:15:05 PM »
Hello everyone.  I lost the love of my life a little more than a year ago to colon cancer.  She was only 52 years old.  As father to three adult children, I have tried to be the rock.  I suffered a quad bypass four months ago, and my rock is crumbling.  I don't have my compass to guide me now.  It is hard to deal with the loss of my wife as well as the loss of my health.  I am not looking for sympathy, but need a place to express my sorrow and my fears....  And maybe a place to yell. 


Hi.  I'm sorry to hear of your tragic loss, and your health challenges.

I started posting here after I lost my son (he was 29) over a year ago, but I also lost a spouse (his father) many years ago.

All of us here have experienced similar tragedies, and though it is different for everyone, there are also many similarities about the experience of bereavement.  We all understand the pain and grief that accompany loss.

I know what you mean about just needing a place to express yourself - express your sorrow or anger or whatever you are feeling - and I hope you will feel comfortable to do that, here.

Take good care of yourself, and know that you are not alone.


I love thee to the level of every day's Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light. -- Emily Dickinson

You were a gift

browneyedgirl

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Re: It hasn't gotten easier
« Reply #2 on: February 09, 2011, 08:50:14 AM »
Hello ~

I am so very sorry for the loss of your wife.  Welcome to Webhealing, I am sorry that you have to be here with us.  

You have come to the right place, to express your thoughts and feelings, there is always someone to listen.  

Take care of yourself and come back and let us know how you are doing.

Sending love and light.
Tony Repola 07/20/66 – 03/29/09
I know you are fishing in the oceans and streams of heaven

Terry

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    • “Grief is like the ocean; it comes on waves ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is calm, and sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn to swim.” –Vicki Harrison
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Re: It hasn't gotten easier
« Reply #3 on: February 09, 2011, 10:35:36 AM »
Hi HeartbrokeninGa,

I'm so sorry to hear of the great loss of your wife and also of the problems that are weighing heavy on you right now. I can relate so much to what you've shared regarding being the 'rock' as I have always been and for so many.
I care for my Dad, many years now and he is in latter stages of AD and I will tell you that if you don't take very good care of yourself, the ones who are depending on you to be strong and hold it all together, are going to be alone.
The caregiver, whether it's for someone like my Dad or for children who need so much of you, your time, your life....has to stay healthy; both emotionally and physically.

I've found this life to be such a challenge and a continuous one.

Regarding your quad bypass four months ago; how are you healing? And, are you on an exercise regimen and special diet for your heart? I ask because you mentioned, 'the loss of your health.' Is there anything else going on?

Grieving, in itself is very draining and can zap our immune systems leaving us with little to no energy to function. I'm glad you can share what's going on and what's troubling you. That is a very healthy step toward feeling better emotionally as well.

Welcome to our Webhealing family and thank you for sharing your story with us.

Again, I'm so sorry you lost the love of your life.

Know I care and I'm sending lots of hugs and my love,

(((((((((((((((((HeartbrokeninGa))))))))))))))))))))

Terry

johnkmurray

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Re: It hasn't gotten easier
« Reply #4 on: February 13, 2011, 10:40:24 AM »
Hello everyone.  I lost the love of my life a little more than a year ago to colon cancer.  She was only 52 years old.  As father to three adult children, I have tried to be the rock.  I suffered a quad bypass four months ago, and my rock is crumbling.  I don't have my compass to guide me now.  It is hard to deal with the loss of my wife as well as the loss of my health.  I am not looking for sympathy, but need a place to express my sorrow and my fears....  And maybe a place to yell.

Feel free to share your feelings ... or yell. You're not alone. I found this forum to be a safe haven where I could express my fears, my grief, my ... whatever jumbled feelings arose from my own loss.

April 7th will mark a year since I lost my wife, Kit, to abdominal cancer (unknown primary) and since then it has been a struggle to maintain some semblance of mental and physical health. Heck, some days I think just getting out of bed in the morning is a major accomplishment! 

So yell away, and depending on where you are in GA you might just hear an answering yell. That'll be me, screaming into the night!

John

Terry

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Re: It hasn't gotten easier
« Reply #5 on: February 13, 2011, 07:03:10 PM »

Hi John...I've missed reading your posts and always think of you. Nice to see you today!

((((((((((((John)))))))))))

Love,
Terry