Author Topic: ((Paula))  (Read 35 times)

Terry

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((Paula))
« on: August 26, 2015, 07:50:25 PM »

Hi Paula - How are things? Is Kait home and if so how is she adjusting?

Thinking of you and Craig and I hope Craig's health is improving.

Hugs
:love9:
"Take the best, and leave the rest" AND "If it doesn't apply, let it fly"

Adams Brokenhearted Mama

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Re: ((Paula))
« Reply #1 on: August 27, 2015, 05:05:22 AM »
It's my normal cluster fu*k. Craig is slightly improving, will see Dr. on 9/1. Kaiti is self destructive. No drugs, but impulsive choices that will most likely wind up sending her back inside. I want to crawl back inside my Mom's womb where all was safe and worry-free.
Thanks for checking in honey
XO
XO Love to all my sisters & brothers-in-grief XO
Wishing you all peaceful moments, signs from your Angels & many blessings

Terry

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Re: ((Paula))
« Reply #2 on: August 27, 2015, 09:24:24 AM »

I understand regarding Kait. Because I've heard so many people share that even though they are clean and sober, they still have the behaviors that they have to struggle daily with to keep in check....their addictive personality. And, for some that addiction is chaos. Because chaos walks hand in hand with addiction and they almost can't live without some form of it. They make sure that it surrounds them and they thrive on seeing others fall prey to it. It's so complicated, isn't it? Our Kait is always in my thoughts. I feel as though I know her after all of these years hearing what she's been through and what you and Craig have been through with her. You are both such good and loving parents. In my heart of hearts I know that Kait knows this and appreciates this, even though she may not always show it to you both.
Only love for Kait. :love9:

Your posts, Paula always touch an emotion in me and this one has special meaning as you shared of your mother's womb and feeling safe again and worry-free as only one could in such a sacred place. The first 30 years of my life I was a city girl. I left the city and the memories of the unbearable pain of burying two children at the time. I needed a change and a new perspective on life for me and Jeff. The next thirty years have been spent in the country and now since Jeff died there are only memories of him and everywhere. I didn't know if I could stay here for the last chapter of my life - I'm a believer of the "three chapter life" - and so it continues. And it wasn't until about ten years ago that I knew for sure that I could stay here. I knew and believed in my heart that I could incorporate 29 years of memories and find happiness again. Not the same happiness as before my children died but a peace that I could call safe. Safe, such a small word with such a big meaning. My future is all about living in peace; exploring and redefining its meaning.

So, thanks for the reminder that feeling safe or finding safe isn't just wishful thinking. It begins in the womb as all of our memories do, whether we can recall them or not. And, today I am grateful for my mother and for the beautiful memories she instilled in me that I'm finding are lasting a lifetime - well into the third chapter of my life.

Lots of love to you, Paula!
:love9:
"Take the best, and leave the rest" AND "If it doesn't apply, let it fly"