Author Topic: Introductions  (Read 22675 times)

Ranger32080

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Re: Introductions
« Reply #30 on: December 06, 2012, 11:44:56 AM »
Ty BrownEyedGirl

Sara Ann

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Re: Introductions
« Reply #31 on: June 16, 2013, 05:38:11 PM »
Hi Lynne,

I'm touched by how well you took care of your father. I'm sure you brought a lot of peace and comfort to him. He didn't die alone; he had you with him, caring for him. This is a precious gift you gave him.

I'm saying a prayer now that God will light your path and that you will know that your Dad cherished you and appreciated everything you did for him. I know your memories are sweet, and that you are holding onto them like the jewels that they are.

God bless you and keep you,

Sara Ann

IwillPraiseHim2013

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Re: Introductions
« Reply #32 on: November 22, 2013, 08:41:30 PM »
Hello All, I am IwillPraiseHim2013

I lost my mother to Advanced Liver Cancer 10/13/13.  My world is upside down.  The hospital gave me this website address. 

Good evening

browneyedgirl

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Re: Introductions
« Reply #33 on: November 22, 2013, 10:03:48 PM »
Welcome to Webhealing.  I am so very sorry for the loss of your Mother.  You have come the right place.....we are here for you. 
Tony Repola 07/20/66 – 03/29/09
I know you are fishing in the oceans and streams of heaven

Cindyc

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Re: Introductions
« Reply #34 on: February 10, 2014, 08:06:10 AM »
I don't know were to begin. I will start out telling you that I lost my youngest daughter of Twins 3 yrs old and oldest daughter 7 at the time of her death. She was only 27 passed away of a massive heart attck. It was so hard on us when we re'cvd the phone call. Her one yr Ann. was 2-9-2014 . But before the one yr I lost my mom Dec 28th 2013 from infection that took her life in 3 days. I was with her all 3 days to the end. Then my Dad was sick at the same time we got thru mom's services and My Dad went into the hosptial he was there after he got rid of his sickness they put him in Rehab to build his strength he had a broken heart of mom's passing, he passed away Jan 29th 2014. So right now I'm Num and need some asst. on what Book would be good to read , mind you I dont like to read alot so I dont want a thik book. But I need to find the right Train track to get on and start dealing with all of this. I do talk to someone every week that helps some need something else also thanks for your support

Terry

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Re: Introductions
« Reply #35 on: February 12, 2014, 10:27:40 AM »

((((Cindy))))

I'm sorry to learn of the death of both of your parents. It's so difficult living without those we love. Know we are here for you. Post anytime. :love9:

Love,
Terry
"I'm thankful I have my writing to turn to.  And reading and my pets.  It is at times like these, I remind myself to think of gratitude and things I am thankful for." -Wally (Wally49er/Spouse Loss)

hillariousmac

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Re: Introductions
« Reply #36 on: February 16, 2014, 11:15:00 PM »
Hi my name is Hillary and I lost my mother 6 months ago.

It is her birthday in two days and I am still awash with grief. She died about six weeks after my marriage. She seemed completely healthy and her normal jovial and loving self on my wedding day. She was however, as always, struggling with her relationship with my father. She died four days before their 45th wedding anniversary. She told me over the phone about two weeks before she went into hospital that she was going to leave him. I can't tell anyone this, expect my sister.

Mum was my soulmate, my best friend. I feel like an orphan, my father is a child she had cared for for 45 years. He is an alcoholic. He hasn't eaten properly since she died.. Or cared for himself at all. I have to coax him to bathe, to eat. He won't pick up a thing other than a bottle. If I leave him for three days I come back to empty bottles lining the lounge. My sister is much older than me but she is not coping either. Her marriage is in tatters. Mum's sisters have ostracised her. There have been police reports and blocking of phone numbers and Facebook accounts etc. I feel like I haven't just lost one person I feel like my whole family has disintegrated without her. She bound us to one another...

She was an artist. A teacher. She connected with anyone she met. She was caring and passionate and kind. She and I shared a closeness I have not come close to anywhere except with my husband. I
It is not the same though. I think it might be in 20 years but right now I feel so alone.

I have to stop now because I am overcome. Xo

hhartnell68

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Re: Introductions
« Reply #37 on: January 24, 2015, 02:09:03 PM »
Hello my name is Heather. I lost my father on Christmas Day Dec 25, 2014. i was very close to him as we had bonded over the years as my mom passed away in 1992. I miss him so much!!! He had a rough go the last 6 months with bladder cance r and multiple hospilizations. I am glad he is no longer suffering but it is so weird not to have him around anymore. He has always been there for every event in my life...for 38 years!

Janka

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Re: Introductions
« Reply #38 on: January 24, 2015, 04:47:07 PM »
Dear Heather!

I´m so sorry for your loss!I lost my father long ago because of the gullet´s cancer.I was with him when he died in the hospital.

I´m on here because of the worst loss of my life as my beloved man Jan,the love of my life,my everything suddenly died.It happened 3 years ago but it hurts the most.You´re in the right place as we all know what you´ve been going through and I´m here for you,too.

Hugs from Janka
« Last Edit: January 24, 2015, 04:52:46 PM by Janka »
​I always kiss you from the heart,my endless love,
you know how much I love you,also stars above,
you will always be my dearest and only one,
I can not wait to be with you,my beloved Jan.

Janka

Janka

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Re: Introductions
« Reply #39 on: January 24, 2015, 04:51:05 PM »
Dear Heather!

I´m so sorry for your loss!I lost my father long ago because of the gullet´s cancer.I was with him when he died in the hospital.

I´m on here because of the worst loss of my life as my beloved man Jan,the love of my life,my everything suddenly died.It happened 3 years ago but it hurts the most.You´re in the right place as we all know what you´ve been going through and I´m here for you,too.

Hugs from Janka


PS:I´m on the board of the Spouse and Partner Loss.You can read my post,videos and poems I´ve written there for my beloved man Jan.

Hugs from Janka
« Last Edit: January 24, 2015, 05:00:53 PM by Janka »
​I always kiss you from the heart,my endless love,
you know how much I love you,also stars above,
you will always be my dearest and only one,
I can not wait to be with you,my beloved Jan.

Janka

Bethb

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Re: Introductions
« Reply #40 on: February 02, 2015, 07:22:55 AM »
Hello. My name is Beth and I am 48 years old and from Ohio. Last year I lost my father. He was living at my house and going through dementia and COPD. He was declining rapidly and we had called in hospice for help. Then.. Sundowners set in. I spent about 4 nights sleeping on the floor in his room-to keep him safe-my mom put him in a different bedroom cause SHE needed HER sleep. We ended up having to put him in inpatient hospice and then 2 weeks later he died. I got the call at work and rushed over and sat with his body for a few hours. ( mom just couldn't do it ). I don't know that this is a loss I can get over. I now have my mother living in my house who constantly says "hospice killed him" but also says " I need to find a man " it hasn't even been a year !!! My father and I were very close and my mother made his life miserable. I promised him I would care for her but I wish she had gone first. I don't know how to get over his loss and my loathing of her ! Please help - if there IS help

Terry

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Re: Introductions
« Reply #41 on: February 02, 2015, 11:12:45 AM »

Hi Beth,

I'm very sorry to learn that your father has died and your pain of having to live without him. My Dad died two years ago on December 18th and being Daddy's girl I am just lost so I understand. My Dad also had Alzheimers and I cared for him in my home for 11 years. I know all about sun down and the changes they go through when the light disappears.....it's a very scary time for them.

We don't get *over* a loss, ever. We do, however learn to live without them in our lives but that takes time and the work of grief, and a whole lot of patience with ourselves because grief can't be rushed. We never stop missing them. Remember that the pain is fueled by our love for them. It is truly the price of loving.

I had a similar situation with my sister, as she was not a nurturer and if I was not around I fear that my Dad would have been placed in a home. I'm just grateful that I was here and able to care for Dad. Not everyone is able to do it, Beth. That doesn't make them a bad person it just makes them incapable of nurturing another human being.
And, as far as your Mom needing someone so soon after your Dad died....some people are afraid and lonely when their spouse dies and they marry out of fear. Fear of growing old alone. Just fear for whatever reason. They also marry out of love. But, more times than not it's fear. We can't control another person or who they choose to be with, though I understand your confusion and your pain. My Mom died back in 1977 and my Dad never remarried....in fact never looked at another woman. But, that was my Dad. We are all unique individuals. I am a lot like my Dad and never looked after my last husband died. I've had wonderful husbands and I've known great love. I'm comfortable with myself and happy and much more than that, at peace with living alone. I don't have that great need to *find* someone....my life is already complete. But, that's me. We're all different.
I know a couple that when one died the other remarried quickly and he is such a good man and remains very happy. I'll look for the post (it's a nice story) and post the link so you can read it for yourself.

It seems the relationship with you and your Mom is very strained at this time. Is there any way that you can talk in a therapeutic environment? If not, maybe a little space so you can have the time to sort things out in your mind as you're working through your grief. A year is not a long time, Beth. Be gentle with yourself...you've had a great loss.

I'm sure they'll be other members sharing with you as they have also experienced the surviving parent marrying soon afterwards and it was very difficult for them. Read through the posts on Parent Loss and you'll see that you're not alone in how you're feeling.

Welcome to Webhealing and know that someone is always here to listen, send a hug and to understand. And, when you feel up to it, tell me about your Dad. Who he was and your relationship. There's no greater way to honor them than to talk about them, or in this case, write.

Sending you lots of hugs and my love, :love9:

(((((((((Beth)))))))))

Terry
"I'm thankful I have my writing to turn to.  And reading and my pets.  It is at times like these, I remind myself to think of gratitude and things I am thankful for." -Wally (Wally49er/Spouse Loss)

Bethb

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Missing dad
« Reply #42 on: February 02, 2015, 04:27:59 PM »
Terry that was a wonderful post. My father "got me". He understood my sense of humor and my caring attitude. My mother is just the opposite. She is a narcissist. I have also suffered the loss of an older brother, a twin brother, two sisters in laws two brother in laws and my mother in law all I the past 8 years. My fathers death being the hardest.i hope this forum can help me to heal ,

Terry

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Re: Missing dad
« Reply #43 on: February 02, 2015, 05:31:10 PM »

Terry that was a wonderful post. My father "got me". He understood my sense of humor and my caring attitude. My mother is just the opposite. She is a narcissist. I have also suffered the loss of an older brother, a twin brother, two sisters in laws two brother in laws and my mother in law all I the past 8 years. My fathers death being the hardest.i hope this forum can help me to heal ,


Hey Beth, I'm sure your Dad knew you like no one else and that bond will never be broken; it can't be by either separation nor death. And that very special part of your Dad that is etched on your soul and that has filled your heart with so much joy will forever be a part of you, the rest of your days. The memories we make after our loved ones die are very important, too. It's in the remembering that keeps them alive not only in our heart but in the heart of others.

I journal and I also write to my loved ones who have died. It helps, a lot. We get those feelings out and down on paper and it makes it concrete, real and lasting. This is your journey and it begins today. What direction it takes will be completely up to you. I came to Webhealing when my oldest and surviving son died and I've found myself again. With each loss, we lose a little of ourselves at first and it takes work to find all of those pieces again.

One day at a time and sometimes it's even one second at a time. The pain can be overwhelming especially around their special dates. When you find the time post your Dad's dates and I will post them on the calendar for you so he is always remembered. And the same applies to any other family member if you want to share about them. There are many different boards here so feel free to use them....it's what they are for.

Hugs, :love9:
Terry


"I'm thankful I have my writing to turn to.  And reading and my pets.  It is at times like these, I remind myself to think of gratitude and things I am thankful for." -Wally (Wally49er/Spouse Loss)

Janka

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Re: Introductions
« Reply #44 on: February 02, 2015, 06:42:37 PM »
Dear Beth!

I´m sorry for your loss,too!I´m from the board of the Spouse and Partner Loss,but as you´ve read here I also lost my father and was with him when he died in the hospital.After reading your post I need to reply,because as well as Terry said,there must be someone like you to understand you well.I never wrote about it here,but now it´s the right time to talk to.I was like my father and my mother made his life miserable,too.He has been so unhappy with her and died long ago because of the gullet´s cancer after 6 months of his illness.Their unfortunate marriage was the reason I had always suffered from.After my father died,my mother also found another man as a contrast of my father,that has also been about year and in consequence of that my mother has changed very much to deprive me of all the things for giving it to someone else.I was 26 y.o. and had to start again all alone.She even didn´t let me know about funerals of my grandparents and other important things.Then happened the worst thing in my life as my beloved man Jan suddenly died 3 years ago.My heart is crying for him all the time.It will never stop until I meet my beloved Jan again...He is the love of my life,the greatest,only one and irreplaceable for the rest of my life...my everlasting love...my most beautiful being...my best...my everything...forever...I must be strong because of him and it will bring me to the end my beloved Jan will be waiting for...waiting for me...for me in heaven forever.

One day we´ll be with our loved ones again.

Hugs,

Janka

​I always kiss you from the heart,my endless love,
you know how much I love you,also stars above,
you will always be my dearest and only one,
I can not wait to be with you,my beloved Jan.

Janka