Hi, my name is Laura,and I am new here. I lost my husband to prostate cancer which had spread to his liver. I had know him for 14 years,but only been married to him for 7 months. He and I fought this demon for 12 years. We tried everything possible. There were many Doctors visits,surgeries,chemo,radiation,blood transfusions ect. It may sound strange,but since he died I am not able to get rid of any of his things. He was in hospice at our home for 2 weeks before he died. Leading up to his death he had a bleeding episode,and I was alone with him. This was frighting,but I did manage to get the bleeding to stop after about 15 minutes. He died the next evening,and I keep replaying all the details in my mind. I am coping,but have no appetite. We would always eat together. Hospice didn't help me much. My family and I are upset about that.He died May 19th and already some people think I should get on with my life. Losing a partner is one of lifes most difficult and painful experiences. There are so many things we will never get to do together. i am numb. Life just continues on,and it is difficult for me to move with it.I feel I have one foot in the past with him and our memories,and one foot in the present trying to live without him. This is not my first loss. Both my father and mother are dead. I am coming to realize that death is part of life,and that we all must face it at sometime in our lives. When it arrives it is my worst nightmare come true. It takes away the joy of living,and every day just becomes about survival. it helps to be with people who understand what it is like. The pain is to powerful for me to deal with it alone. How do others here feel about death?