I'm so sorry.
You dont have to be "strong" for your 2 y/o. If you need to cry, let it happen. Its ok. Perhaps someone can watch him for awhile while you have time to yourself to do this.
Ask for help. There may be others around you who have lost loved ones thru the years and will know what the first steps are in planning a funeral. The funeral home will help you along the way as well, step by step. Just dont be afraid to ask for help. The atty will help you step by step with his estate. They do it all the time.
I lost my mother to a heart attack 6 yrs ago, and had to plan it all, and deal with the estate so I know how overwhelming it is, not knowing what to do first.
This is a great place to come for encouragement and help along the way in your grief walk.
Lauren