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Child Loss / It has been 5 years today
« on: June 04, 2009, 06:56:13 AM »
I havent been to the board in quite a while..when the board changed its forum I had a hard time with it and couldnt seem to figure out how to post Ronnies pictures...I am here today to say hi to all of those who helped me through the first days, weeks, months and years...I dont think I would be here now if not for all of you..And I would also like to say hi to all of the parents that have come here after me and that I am so so sorry that you are here...but you will be able to hold on a little tighter with help from others here...
One thing that never seems to leave even after that overwhelming grief leaves..is the thought ' I still cant believe you are gone'...I know that you are gone but I cant believe you are gone..This is one of my fleeting thougths from time to time..and i woke this morning rolled over in bed to look at Ronnies picture and that was my thought...I sat here at my computer and I saw that a candle had been lit at Ronnies website so went to read it, I lit one then had tears for a while...
I am sending out healing loving thoughts to all of you in hopes that I can help in some small way...
Love Karen
Ronnies Mom
One thing that never seems to leave even after that overwhelming grief leaves..is the thought ' I still cant believe you are gone'...I know that you are gone but I cant believe you are gone..This is one of my fleeting thougths from time to time..and i woke this morning rolled over in bed to look at Ronnies picture and that was my thought...I sat here at my computer and I saw that a candle had been lit at Ronnies website so went to read it, I lit one then had tears for a while...
I am sending out healing loving thoughts to all of you in hopes that I can help in some small way...
Love Karen
Ronnies Mom
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Child Loss / I cant post a picture
« on: June 08, 2007, 01:33:07 PM »
I have tried to down size the picture and I still get this error. Can anyone help..thnaks Karen
The upload folder is full. Please try a smaller file and/or contact an administrator
The upload folder is full. Please try a smaller file and/or contact an administrator
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Child Loss / I feel so down..
« on: June 08, 2007, 12:59:03 PM »
I would have thought after 3 years I would be in a better place.....I am lost...I dont work....I feel like I havent found a reason to continue...wandering through the days...sleeping as much as possible...no energy at all...I have tried to find a reason but always I seem to hit a wall..I just dont know what to do any more...
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Child Loss / My Boyfriend had a dream about Ronnie
« on: January 08, 2007, 11:43:51 PM »My boyfriend had a dream last THursday. He was with Ronnie. They drove in Ronnies car.He helped Ronnie at one point get out of a jam...Mark asked him if he was here for his Grandmother.Ronnie didnt answer him but Mark felt that he was...What we got from this dream is that Ronnie is going to cross my Mom over when she passes..
We will have to see if this dream has a straight forward meaning..I am bummed that I cant have dreams with Ronnie in them....
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Child Loss / My Aunts Son
« on: January 08, 2007, 11:38:24 PM »I cant believe this..I got an email from my Aunt.Her Son, my cousin who was younger than me, passed away tonight...what a crazy crazy crazy world we live in..
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Child Loss / oops i made a post in error
« on: January 03, 2007, 09:03:49 AM »
Sorry everyone that responded to my post of Ronnies birthday....I was adding Ronnies dates to the calender and didnt know that they would post a message...this board will take some getting used to..
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Child Loss / Im glad the holiday is over!!!!!
« on: January 01, 2007, 11:44:04 AM »
I didnt have the time to miss Ronnie this year. My mom went into the hospital a few days after Thanksgiving and then to a rehab facility to strengthen her to come home. I was with my Dad the whole time sitting with my Mom every day. I traveled home the day that my Mom came home. Some of you know that it is a3 1/2 hour trip each way to and from my parents house. I returned 3 days later to celebrate christmas with one of my daughters who couldnt come on christmas day because of work.b I drove home the next day to get ready for christmas (gifts that I hadnt made yet and baking at the end of the week) I also was shopping for my parents for christmas. My bf and i drove back to my parents on christmas eve to spend the holioday with my parents and my kids and grandkids and sister who would arrive the next day.
My Mom wasnt feeling good and said she wanted to go to the hospital...We gave her a breathing treatment and got her oxygen level back to 90. she had been at 74 which is very bad for her..We had a rough christmas eve and christmas wasnt any better. I had to leave for home that night because my bf had to go to work on Tuesday. I had a feeling I would be coming back...I just felt my Mom wasnt doing good. I got home christmas night at 12:45am..i guess it was tuesday by then....We went right to bed...not even unpacking....I got a call the next morning (tuesday)...from my daughter..she told me that my sister who lived near by had put a call into the dr and was waiting for a call back...I showered and was on the road by 11 am...I arrived at my parents at 3:30pm , dropped off the dog and drove to the hospital, 20 minutes away..my mom was still in the ER..The day after christmas is a very busy day there..My mom was in the Er for 8 hours getting up o a room around 8:30pm....I think we were there till mindight...we spent the next 2 days there until almost midnight every night..I had to get my Dad out of there he was looking so tired..THis is a lot for an 80 yr old man to take..We got my Mom home Thursday night around 8pm..They discharged her about 3pm but she was so weak and any exertion sent her into a tailspin and her oxygen would fall into the 80's....It was a rough few days but I left for home sunday morning arriving here about 1:30pm..I feel completely depleted of energy..I dont know if I will crack when I finally am able to sit in silence tomorrow when I am alone..I have had a couple of crys since christmas but I was scared for my Mom and i thought we were losing her...I will be very surprised if she makes another christmas on this earth...Just wanted to let all of my friends here know that I havent been here for a reason and the couple of times I had tried to post I wasnt familiar with the forum and couldnt remember my password that was written at home..
I hope everyone has been able to find some peace during the holidays..
Love Karen
www.ronnie-hetu.memory-of.com
www.khetu.250free.com/christmashndface.jpg
My Mom wasnt feeling good and said she wanted to go to the hospital...We gave her a breathing treatment and got her oxygen level back to 90. she had been at 74 which is very bad for her..We had a rough christmas eve and christmas wasnt any better. I had to leave for home that night because my bf had to go to work on Tuesday. I had a feeling I would be coming back...I just felt my Mom wasnt doing good. I got home christmas night at 12:45am..i guess it was tuesday by then....We went right to bed...not even unpacking....I got a call the next morning (tuesday)...from my daughter..she told me that my sister who lived near by had put a call into the dr and was waiting for a call back...I showered and was on the road by 11 am...I arrived at my parents at 3:30pm , dropped off the dog and drove to the hospital, 20 minutes away..my mom was still in the ER..The day after christmas is a very busy day there..My mom was in the Er for 8 hours getting up o a room around 8:30pm....I think we were there till mindight...we spent the next 2 days there until almost midnight every night..I had to get my Dad out of there he was looking so tired..THis is a lot for an 80 yr old man to take..We got my Mom home Thursday night around 8pm..They discharged her about 3pm but she was so weak and any exertion sent her into a tailspin and her oxygen would fall into the 80's....It was a rough few days but I left for home sunday morning arriving here about 1:30pm..I feel completely depleted of energy..I dont know if I will crack when I finally am able to sit in silence tomorrow when I am alone..I have had a couple of crys since christmas but I was scared for my Mom and i thought we were losing her...I will be very surprised if she makes another christmas on this earth...Just wanted to let all of my friends here know that I havent been here for a reason and the couple of times I had tried to post I wasnt familiar with the forum and couldnt remember my password that was written at home..
I hope everyone has been able to find some peace during the holidays..
Love Karen
www.ronnie-hetu.memory-of.com
www.khetu.250free.com/christmashndface.jpg
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Child Loss / Hi Everyone
« on: December 02, 2006, 10:20:20 AM »
Its nice to be back with friends...i hope I am doing this right
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