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Topics - marzz

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Child Loss / Hi everybody this is Kelly's mum
« on: August 16, 2010, 06:50:25 PM »
Been awhile, but read posts often.
Over 4ys now since I lost Kelly and 2ys since my husband die.
My God it's been hard, With no one to talk to about Kelly
being all alone and having lots of heath pro's.
My grief for Kelly has softened a little now, which I never would not have belived
If someone would have said that it would  to me in the first year's'
they would have been talking out there hats.
I smile now at the beautiful memories of her now, cry too. (a lot)

Don't see a lots of photo's our great kids so much now miss there lovely faces
that's good I hope, it mean's their getting on with life, acceptance their sadness.
And that we learn to know that sadness is part of our life's now.
know I'm rambling on
not good with words.
Tom thankyou so very much for this website know that you have help so many parents
in this hell of a journey.

Love to all Marzz Kelly's mum

Child Loss / Kelly dad died
« on: April 30, 2008, 06:52:38 AM »
It's been a while, but I read when I can.
Max my husband of 43 year's of marrage died on the 23th march 08
I nursed him all the way it was so very hard.
Now I,m just so empty inside,
My grief for my daugther Kelly 20 month's now is so stronge it take my breath away.
I need her love and hugs more then ever, but she's not hear also.
  O God what to do?    Just so overwhelm don't won't to wakeup to another day of this.
I have nothing left to give or to hope for,
sorry for all of this in your sadness too.
But had to write it down.


Child Loss / Don't know what to say.....
« on: February 08, 2008, 02:18:32 AM »
Just to let you know I'm still reading often when I have the time,
Looking after Max is a 24 hr job.
Sending my love to all of you. Big Kiss to our kids.

Max is getting a lot weaker now, the pain and med's knock him around a lot but his spirit is good
which is a good help's to me, I am very very tired it's a long haul.

My daughter Kelly is with me in my heart to help me through the hard times
But the missing of her sends me over the top sometime's.
Dam.... not good at all of putting words together their so much I like to say
to you all this place is my life line, love looking at the pic's of all our kids you are family
now I feel your pain the love you have for your lost one's.

Peace and lots of hugs Marzz  ((Mary))

Child Loss / Sharing
« on: October 31, 2007, 08:14:42 AM »
Please Say Their Names

The time of concern is over
No longer are we asked how we’re doing
Never are the names of our children mentioned to us
For most, the drama is over.

What can be said,  you ask?
Please say their names to us
Love does not die
Their names are written on our lives and souls
The sound of their voices replay within our minds
You may feel they are dead
We feel they are dead and still they live
Their ghost walk our souls, beckoning in welcome.

You say they were our children
We say they are
Please say their names to us
It hurts to bury their memories in silence
What they were in flesh is no longer with us
What they are in spirit stirs within us always.

Please understand we cannot forget
We would not even if we could
We know that you cannot know
Yesterday we were like you
We do not ask you to walk this road
The ascent is steep and the burden heavy
We walk it not by choice.

What we have lost you cannot feel
What we have gained, you may not see
Please say their names, for they are alive and part of us
In many ways we’ve never parted
They are real and shadow; they were and are.

Please say their names to us, and say their names again
They are our children, and we love them as we always did
More each day
Please say their names.
{{Kelly Kelly Kelly}}

Author unknown

Love Marzz

Child Loss / Overwhelming feeling
« on: October 28, 2007, 04:24:09 AM »
Sometimes I have this overwhelming feeling so intense that my daughter
Kelly is still alive and with me, that Kelly cannot have died
 …… then I think of holding her hand when she die.
Don’t know which is real sometime
The missing gets so strong it must be my heart crying out to her

Need her now so much,   now that her dad Max is so ill maybe only weeks
hopefully a lot longer, please.
I just can’t lose both of them Max is getting weaker.
Kelly my love stay with me make me strong
Love you so much sweetheart.

Sorry but just wont'ed to say what I was feeling.
Mary Kelly’s mum

Child Loss / Hello to all of you
« on: October 15, 2007, 07:56:13 AM »
Have not posted for a long while,
But I read here everyday and my love goes out to you all
It's been over 15 months now since I lost my daughter Kelly
I'm just a empty shell with nothing to live for.
I feel so sad for those of you who have other young children
and have to cope, it must be so very hard on you and them.
My husband of 41 year's marriage Max as just got a diagnosis of advanced cancer there's
nothing they can do for him, I think he new something was wrong
with him after our daughter died but never said anything so I'm looking
after him at home.
But you know I'm just so empty I am feeling nothing I still love him dearly
we have a good marriage,
It seem very cold to me but my grief for Kelly rules my heart now.
I must find some strength deep down now I hope so that I can care for Kelly's dad.
she love him dearly and he her.
All my love to, peace be with you.
Mary Kelly's mum always.

Child Loss / Can never go back
« on: March 31, 2007, 09:45:50 AM »
Can never go back to that time again when my daughter was alive and well:
So very sad all the time,  My Kelly has been gone for over 9 months now
The missing and crying goes on,
But one thing has changed I don't get that red face or eyes like I use to,
The tears just roll down my cheeks most days now
Just silent tears always,
( still have the bad days though just don't sleep much now)
Always silent tears but don't have the red eyes to show for it so family around
me think ( she's getting over her grief now )

The fools!!  only you mum's and dad's know that it's not true.
Thank goodness for this board and your loving thoughts
here because you know.
Sending my love to you all Marzz

Thank you Tom, Dena,
It has become a much safer place to come too now
and the read posts here,
thank you again for all your good work.

Love marzz

Child Loss / Not Coping At All With This Hell
« on: January 16, 2007, 08:07:53 AM »
Just not coping at all don't know where to turn.
This last few weeks have been hell, not sleeping
2 hours here and there.
6 months now, miss Kelly soooo much, don't won't
to be here with out her, I'm so down can't get myself
out of it.
Just can't go out of the house anymore, don't won't to
see anybody.
Sorry so down.......

Love to all and are great Kids  *marzz*

Child Loss / Love to all let are tears fall with love
« on: December 24, 2006, 07:34:50 PM »
Just charing this photo as it is Christmas day here in Australia
and the candle is for all our beautiful children too.
We all need some peace on this hell of a journey.
Love to all, let are tears fall with love.

Child Loss / You know I e-mail my daughter evey day
« on: December 17, 2006, 07:26:18 AM »
I email my kelly everyday made a hotmail address for her,
I finding that it helps me so much, as though she is still here.
I can say what I like to her there, and pour out my saddness
hurt and love,  well it goes out to space!
It may be nuts but it helps me sometimes when the missing
get so hard.
Can really talk to her there. wish I could get a reply.

hugs to you all  Marzz

Child Loss / Found this card for my daughter
« on: December 15, 2006, 03:13:21 AM »
A card to my daughter Kelly which I bought today,
when I read it in the shop I cried and cried and can't stop.
5 months now and the pain is getting worst then ever.
I know this pain will never end because my love for her will
never end, but I did have 36ys of her love, O I'm so alone
with this.
I'm sorry but I can't stand it.

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