Show Posts

This section allows you to view all posts made by this member. Note that you can only see posts made in areas you currently have access to.


Topics - KerrysLiLSister

Pages: [1]
1
Child Loss / My Big Sister.
« on: July 04, 2007, 01:41:08 PM »
My only sister, Kerry killed along with her husband and son. 

I miss you Kerry, so very much..

2
Sibling Loss / 4 Month Anniversary.....Sis, Bro in Law, nephew
« on: July 03, 2007, 03:50:40 PM »
Hi;

Well, I can't tell you how many times I have tried starting a new topic and everytime I just delete my post and go about my day.  Tomorrow.  On Independance Day will be the 4 month anniversary since I lost my sister, brother in law and nephew.  Not a very good day to celebrate. 

I'm slowly putting the pieces back together but I still feel empty inside.  I have been so busy with the estates and with my niece and taking care of the house and bills that I don't really have time to grieve anymore.  Sad isn't it?  I feel guilty for not thinking about kerry and tim and rusty all the time.  I feel guilty that I've had to step into my sister's shoes and take over where she had stopped. 

I feel guilty about alot of things.  I feel guilty that I am the one still on earth and I'm the one who is going to see my 17 y/o niece graduate and I feel guilty that I am the one who will drop her off at the college campus for her very first day.  I feel guilty that I am the one who will see her fulfill her dreams of becoming a teacher.  I feel guilty that I am the one that will help her pick out her wedding gown and plan her wedding.  I feel guilty that I am the one who will be at the hospital when she delivers her first child.   I just feel guilty.

I try to enjoy Sam's accomplishments but I feel guilty for that as well. 

I miss my sister so much.  I can't believe she has been gone for 4 months now.  I still wait for her to walk through the door.  I'm waiting for that phone call telling me her vacation is wonderful.  I'm waiting for anything to happen so I know she is ok. 

Every day I wonder if I am making my sister proud.  Am i doing ok with Sam?  Am I making the right decisions for her and would kerry make the same decisions I have made? 

Sam has told me that she is so upset that her children won't have an uncle. and she won't be an aunt.  I know exactly how she feels.  My children won't have an aunt either.  They won't know that my sister was a beautiful person inside and out. 

As I go through paperwork I never really knew what struggles my sister was going through.  I never knew how strong and bull headed she was.  I always though she was the weak one, the one who didn't stand up for herself but I was so wrong.   Instead, Kerry was one who didn't burden other people with her problems.  She put on a smile and lived everyday to the fullest. 

I know I'm rambling and I'm sorry.  I better hit post now before I delte this one too.  Thanks for listening and letting me vent. 
Tracy

3
Child Loss / Searched my sister's name and found this website
« on: June 08, 2007, 12:51:33 PM »
Hi Everyone, let me introduce myself to you.  My name is Tracy and I am from Pittsburgh PA.  I have now relocated and live in Dundee NY.  You first heard about my family from mellissacharlie'smom. 

My sister Kerry, brother in law Tim and Nephew Rusty were killed on March 4 2007 in a tragic car accident.  My Niece Sami is the only survivor of this family now.  I received the phone call about my sister from Sam at about 4:30 and drove straight here from Pittsburgh.  I haven't left.   My husband and mother are still in Pittsburgh taking care of our home and working on eventually relocating with me.  I became a single parent/guardian overnight. 

I didn't know what I was going to do with Sami after the car accident.  It was drilled into Sam's head that I was going to take her away to pittsburgh, so as you can imagine she wasn't that thrilled to see me and neither were some of the town's people.  I had just lost my sister and her family.  To be honest, what to do with Sam wasn't even a thought at that point.   I was not very popular in the beginning and was treated pretty badly by a few people.   I was the wicked witch from Pittsburgh coming to take sam away from the only place she felt safe and comfortable.    I was treated pretty bad by one person inparticular that I had to put my  mourning on hold and the day after my sister was killed, I was calling attorneys getting legal advice.   I have yet to receive an apology.

I knew that taking sam out of the community that she had grown up in would be detrimental to her.  But who would take care of her?  Who would my sister want to care for her daughter?  Then I remembered, a few years ago my sister had asked that if anything ever happened to her or Tim, if I would be willing to take care of their children.  I knew what I had to do. 

I knew that I wouldn't feel right leaving Kerry's daughter with anyone.  Sami is all that I had left of my sister.   Thats when I made the decision to move to Dundee so that Sam could stay in school for the rest of her Junior year and her Senior year graduate with the kids she grew up with.   I asked Sam if she would like me to stay here in Dundee so she wouldn't have to leave her home and she thought it was a great idea.  So here I am. 

The community has been very  helpful to both Sam and I.  The school has been just amazing and has welcomed me with open arms.  The funeral director has been so compassionate with our family and has helped us out more then I can every express.  My sister's best friends Becky and Karl have been here for me whenever I need anything.  A shoulder to cry on, a place to go when I'm lonely and missing my husband and family.  They put their grief on hold to help me and I will never be able to thank them enough. 

I wanted to thanks mellissa for sharing the story with you all when it first happened, and I wanted to let you all know that Sami and I are doing ok.  Like many of you, its a long hard road ahead.  But we are going to make it.

 I know Kerry, Tim and Rusty are in heaven. I know they were greeted by everyone who had touched their lives.  I know they are living in peace for all eternity.  I know I will see them again one day.   My chaplain says I have a right to be mad at god, and I am.  I know god had a reason for doing what he did.  I will learn that reason one day. 

If you ever want to see Kerry, Tim and Rusty..... look to the sky.... search for that shooting star... there you will find Kerry and Tim..... The tail of that shooting star..... well thats rusty... always a step behind.... but shining as bright as ever. 








Pages: [1]