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Messages - Terry

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1
Spouse, Partner Loss / Re: Hi Mark
« on: December 14, 2017, 08:55:42 AM »
Mark,

Glad to read that all is well with you.

Thanks,
Terry

2
Spouse, Partner Loss / Hi Mark
« on: December 01, 2017, 09:00:50 AM »

Hi Mark,

How was your Thanksgiving? Did you have company or was it just a quiet day?

Thinking about you.

Hugs,
Terry

3
Spouse, Partner Loss / Re: Introductions thread
« on: December 01, 2017, 08:58:44 AM »
Hello, I'm not sure this is the right site for me, but I'm giving it a shot.  My name is Maria.  My husband died unexpectedly 14 months ago.  We had 17, not so happy years.  When I got the news, it was almost like a relief.  I've been doing okay.  At least I give the appearance that I am. I've been functioning normally, but when I let my guard down and talk about him or in private I can't help but feel all kinds of emotions.  I know that its okay to allow myself to feel them, and I have.  Mostly my heart aches.  I do have a strong support base of family, friends, and faith.  I'm not looking for sympathy, just guidance and hopefully the right path towards healing and forgiveness.

Hi Maria,

I'm sorry to read about the death of your husband. I understand having mixed emotions on many different levels. This is your time to take all the time you need to sort out all of those feelings. You're way ahead already....you're very honest.

We're here for you. Post any time.

Hugs,
Terry

4
Spouse, Partner Loss / Re: Introductions thread
« on: December 01, 2017, 08:53:14 AM »
Hi All,

My name is Mary Rose, and I lost my husband of 33 years 3 weeks ago today, after a long battle with cancer.  To complicate matters, I lost my Mom on 5/22/17, and my Aunt Shorti (my second Mom), on 10/17/17, five days before my husband.  To say my family is reeling from all this loss would be an understatement.  I realize grieving great love and loss is a process, but OMG it hurts, hurts, hurts too bad

Looking forward to getting to know you all,
Mary Rose

Mary Rose,

I'm so sorry to read of all of your great losses. This is a difficult time of year so reach out and know that we're here for you whenever you post.

Sending hugs & understanding,
Terry

5
Parent Loss / Re: Introductions
« on: November 21, 2017, 09:20:40 AM »
Hello. I lost my mom about 3 weeks ago.  The grief has finally started to settle in.   My mom was in the hospital for 3 months.  Seemed like every time I turned around something was going wrong.  She passed  on Oct 27th 2017.  I am devastated.  My heart breaks for my dad.  It saddens me to think how he must feel.   I would like some ideas how to make it past the holidays and the next few months…


Hi Chase,

I'm so sorry to read of the death of your precious Mom. Welcome to our Webhealing Family.

http://webhealing.com/forums/index.php?topic=7174.msg51384#msg51384 This is a link to the Holiday posts - "The first Christmas after a death" by Susan Dunn is an excellent read and have helped many find ways to cope at this difficult time of year.
It's just you and your Dad entering the holiday season?

Do what is comfortable for you, Chase and for your Dad. Others do not walk in your shoes, they do not feel your pain. We understand here. Post as often as you are comfortable....someone is always reading and reaching out a hand.

We're here for you.

Hugs,
Terry

6
Spouse, Partner Loss / Re: 7 months
« on: November 15, 2017, 03:29:10 PM »
Hi Raven,

I don't think it ever feels like it's getting easier especially when we lose someone we love so much. It's a rough road, this grieving. And, I agree with you that it is both mentally and physically exhausting.
Seven months is still very early grief. I don't think the shock really wears off that soon. Try to be patient with you. Your heart, your soul and your body has taken a beating. Jim was so important to you and such a big part of your life. Those harden feelings of great loss don't soften overnight. One day the pain won't sting as badly as it does now and you'll even smile sharing stories about him. For now, take care of you the best you can and know that the pain you're feeling is the result of your love for Jim. We just can't have one without the other.

Hugs,
Terry



7
Parent Loss / Re: Mom died, and dad is withdrawing - circles of grief
« on: November 15, 2017, 02:23:33 PM »
My mom died a little less than a month ago.  It really hurts.  My dad is taking it very hard, and he disappears and doesn't engage with our family.  I know a little about the circle or ring theory of grief - that you should comfort in, and complain out.  Is he really one more circle in than me?  I know he lost his wife, but my siblings and I lost my mom!  Everyone has been walking on eggshells around him, but that is not working for me. 
How do I support my dad, when what I want from him is comfort?  My siblings are turning to me for the comfort they're not getting from dad.  I want to chastise him for not being there for them too, but I know he is hurting.  I don't think chastisement from his oldest daughter will help or change anything.  I know we need time. 
What do you do with a grieving dad???

Hi Elona,

I'm very sorry to read of the death of your precious Mom. We're all unique in how we grieve. When my Mom died, my Dad was just devastated. Me and my sister were there for him when he needed us. That's really all any of us can do.....be there for one another.  It's a difficult time for everyone.

My advice in how to support your Dad is to be there if he needs you, just as you are a comfort to your siblings. Maybe offer to do some of the things your Dad is not familiar with. He may need help paying the bills, food shopping etc.

Hugs,
Terry

8
Main / Re: My Mom
« on: November 06, 2017, 09:41:49 AM »
(((((Irene)))))

9
Spouse, Partner Loss / Re: Gina's Birthday
« on: November 06, 2017, 09:40:13 AM »
Hi Terry!!! It’s been a very long time. I’m doing okay.. and you??
Life has been one roller coaster ride for me..
My mom moved up here 5 years ago. (She moved in with me 3 years ago) 
Sadly, she passed away on the 8th :-(  My House is so quiet now.
With every death, my heart breaks a little bit more.

What have you been up to? How’s life?

Hey Michelle! There you are! I thought I saw a response. :icon_flower:

I'm so sorry about your Mom. With every death, yes our hearts break a little more. I agree.

I'm doing ok, thanks. Getting ready for the holidays which I never look forward to. Some have been OK but for the most part this time of year is difficult with all of my babies dates and other family within a three month period.

Something I do more of now than ever before in my life is laugh. I laugh a lot. I think that if time does anything at all for our grief it's that it softens those hard edges.  Those painful, jagged edges that we hurt ourselves and others with for so long.

Roller coaster? Yep, that's how life is.

Hugs,
Terry

10
Child Loss / Re: Where is everyone from?
« on: November 06, 2017, 09:25:36 AM »
(((((( eagleeyeskt ))))))

I understand. I'm so sorry for the loss of your precious son.

Welcome to our Webhealing family.

Hugs,
Terry

11
Main / Thinking of you, Gail
« on: October 31, 2017, 08:25:23 AM »
(((((Gail)))))

Remembering your GrandMom on her Angel Date and sending you hugs and wishes for gentle memories to fill your heart. :love9:

Hugs,
Terry

12
Spouse, Partner Loss / Re: Introductions thread
« on: October 20, 2017, 06:55:16 AM »
((((Randi))))

I'm so sorry for your great loss. Welcome to our Webhealing family.

Tell us about your love.

We're here for you.

Hugs,
Terry

13
Sibling Loss / Jolene's Angel Date (Gail)
« on: October 20, 2017, 06:51:50 AM »
(((((Gail)))))

Remembering your precious sister, :angel11: Jolene :angel11: today on her Angel Date. May a special memory find your heart and bring a smile.

Sending hugs and my love,
Terry


14
Parent Loss / Re: my heart is torn to pieces
« on: October 17, 2017, 09:02:22 PM »
I am feeling so broken I lost my Mom in February Dad in July Our fur baby and my 16 year old grandson in September a week apart.

Jim,

I'm so very sorry to read of the multiple deaths of your loved ones that you are living with at this time. It is heartbreaking.
Welcome to our Webhealing family.

As you are able to, please tell us something about your precious loved ones as they were all so special to you. Also if you would like to post their names and dates (Angel, Birth) I will post them on the calendar and they will always be remembered here on Webhealing.
If I can do anything for you, feel free to either message me or post it on the board.

We're here for you.

Hug & understanding,
Terry

15
Spouse, Partner Loss / Happy Birthday Mark!
« on: October 16, 2017, 03:36:03 PM »
Happy Birthday Mark! :occasion13:

Hugs,
Terry


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