Lost my mom on the 25th

[Josh19611985]

Hi, my name is Joshua Jennings, just this last Tuesday i lost my mom due to congestive heart failure, and cad. I got to be there with her when she passed away in the hospital bed, and held her hand till the next shift change. I am so saddened by this because i had to watch her die, because the hopsital staff could no longer do anything to help her. She recently just had a triple bypass just 4 month's prior to passing away, and i have lots of hope only to see her struggle with task such as walking to the mail box. She couldnt breath had jaw pain all the time. I just wish i could have had one more holiday season with her or got to hear her voice one last time. I dont know what to do with my self my father was married to her 26 years. And everyone my mom met loved her she was funny and such a great person, so giving. I dont know how to deal with this i've never lost someone i was so close too before. I've never watched anyone die before and im having bad dreams and cant sleep since 

[missnmom]

Hey Joshua,....man, I'm relating to your post.  I recently lost my mom too...she sounded a lot like yours, funny, giving and loving.  I was with her when she died in the hospital....she had 3 brain aneurysms. I thought I was just taking her in for high blood pressure.  She was babysitting for me the week before.  A week later, she was dead....I'm just now starting to have the dreams too....I'm here in these on-line things now because my friends are tired of hearing about it.  It's weird because I'm the kind of person who would never be tired of hearing someones worries.  My mom was that way too....I guess that is why I never needed a friend to really listen...I had her.  Anyway, here we are...in a new motherless world.  I just wanted you to know you have a friend who feels lost too.  Who can't sleep, who feels alone and abandoned....but we have our friends and those loved ones left and our lost ones are still in us.....listen quietly...she is there...I really think so..

[tsurandy]

I am so sorry for your loss.  You are in my thoughts and in my prayers.  I stayed with my Mama the last 4 days before she died, stupid me, I thought she was going home.  I was there to keep her company.  I wouldn't trade that time, because I enjoyed every minute I ever spent with my Mama.

[bullfrog614]

Joshua, iam sorry for your lost, its really hard, to be so close to someone then there gone especially a parent, in 1999 i lost my Dad and on the 24th of November, i lost my mom, its been so hard, she was in the Hospital, and she just quit breathing, she had lived a full life, she was 91 and still going strong till about 6 months ago, cooking four course meals every Sunday, I feel Bad because i was not there when she passed, but i felt when i left her it would be the last time i would see her,and i kissed her and told her i loved her then went back to work, i worked two hrs away from her, and now today i have regrets of not staying with her, and she had to die alone, thats what iam dealing with today, i understand what you said about watching your mom pass, i work in a hospital i see it at least once a month, but its still hard even when its not a family member, all we have is memories joshua, for anyone who has one of there parents left please cherish the time you have because tomorrow,they may be gone, may God bless you and your Family.

[georgiapeaches]

Joshua, I just lost my mother in November. She was breathing when I got to the hospital and me and my brothers and sister watched her die. She lived a long life she was 85 years old, but that doesnt make it any easier. Your bad dreams that your having, know that your mother is at peace now. I know that its a scarey thing to see, but when my mother died, she just drifted away, very peaceful. If you could think of it like that, maybe your dreams wont be so bad. Dont get me wrong, the hurt doesnt lessen. I'm sure your mother loved you with all her heart and wouldnt want this to scare you. I hope this helped you somehow.

Sweet dreams.

Georgia.