Child abuse

[laurenE]

This is a very sad video but speaks so clearly about the reality of child abuse.    She reminds me of me and my  childhood situation in the video.   The neighbors watched but did nothing to stop it.

  We all have a responsability to save and protect those who are abused.  Never ever forget that. 


http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=QDm03Foq2T0

[Karen Paul]

Lauren - that is very powerful and brings awareness - I'm so sorry to hear that you went through something like this, with no one to stop it or advocate for you - that is heartbreaking - I have so often thought in my life how lucky I am to have the parents I have - I probably never realize exactly how lucky I am - thank you for opening eyes and bringing awareness..

My brother (Chris' dad) works as a social worker for a state Child Abuse hotline and Maltreatment Register - he deals with issues every day that just would put me to the floor- I always have had trouble understanding how he could continue after losing Christopher, his only child - but I think it is the importance of the work that keeps him going..

luv and hugs, Karen

[laurenE]

I  think I can see why he would choose social work as his career. 

   He could not save his own son,   so he has made it his life mission to save other kids out there.   

He is a perfect example of how I believe we are all supposed to respond to tragic events....  learn from our pain and use it to learn how to help others.

What an awesome brother in law.   

[Anne Marie]

He is a perfect example of how I believe we are all supposed to respond to tragic events....  learn from our pain and use it to learn how to help others.What an awesome brother in law.   

Lauren, I am tired so won't introduce myself yet. But wanted to respond to what you wrote. I've been telling myself for at least 5 years now that I hope what I've learned from my experiences and pain I can use to help others. So far that hasn't happened.

I wonder if I am only giving myself false hope in thinking that, since it's been so long. I'm still grieving and don't feel like I've moved forward and certianly can't see how I've helped others.

Hope is sometimes all we have and what keeps us/me going. But it's very hard to hang on to when the reasons for why things happen aren't any clearer now then they ever were, and I don't see any good that's come out of the pain. That's my personal experience anyway.

[laurenE]

maybe its not your time.   It took 13 yrs before door were opened for me.

or more likely....

 Maybe you have inspired someone and you just dont know it yet.   I have found that oftentimes that is the case.  Months, weeks or even yrs later someone will come back to me and tell me how much I have helped them or inspired them.   Usually Im dumbfounded and surprised bc  most of the time I had no clue they were even listening to me.

    We never know who is listening or watching us.  I used to sit back and watch my youth pastor and his wife, taking it all in, learning how to be a married person who does not fight like my parents did.    They tell me now that they never knew someone was watching them and learning  and being inspired by their actions.   I was and I am thankful that I was.

[HiddenOne]

Hi Lauren,
I could not watch all this video.  The memories are so vivid.  But maybe this will help someone.  For the teachers, PLEASE pay attention to the little signals.  I was always getting into trouble with my gym teacher for refusing to participate.  She would get angry and mock me to try to embarrass me into dressing out and playing.  What she did not know and I was terrified to have anyone find out was that I could not dress out.  I was covered in dark bruises, cuts, welts and swelling from the beatings from my mother.  I could barely walk I was so stiff.   And my nother always let me know afterwards if my Dad or anyone ever found  out I would get it twice as bad.  Once I had to cut my clothing off from all the dried blood.  A girl did walk in on me once in the restroom stall as I was trying to get my clothes down and she immediately started throwing up.  I begged her, terrified, not to tell.  I was too young and too afraid to know that someone may have been able to help.  I only knew that I was afraid  and hurting and there was nothing I could do.

[Autumn Leaves]

What was even more interesting, and sad, were many of the comments left by viewers. Besides the atrocious spelling, it appears that many people are apathetic or  in denial or \pretend that the whole topic of child abuse isn't offensive to them.

There have been many stories published lately about the sexual abuse of minors and the use of the Internet by adults to obtain miors and we're momentarily outraged but it all dies down and is forgotten.

There are so many of us who were abused as children but we don't talk about it.

It's good that times have changed to an extent that so many professional people (teachers, medical professionals) are mandated reporters of child abuse by the law but there are still many fears to reporting abuse. There's still the fear of retaliation and lawsuits as well as just not wanting to get involved preventing people from doing something.

I observed a man beating a child with his belt outside the local library. The staff and customers stood around watching. The security guard finally told the man to take it somewhere else. I called the child abuse reporting hotline and they said they couldn't do anything without knowing the name and address of the man and the kid. The 911 operator said it would be at least ten minutes before anyone could arrive there and to get the guy's license place number. The guy finally became aware that he was attracting an audience, put his belt back on, dragged the kid to his car, and left. I was afraid for the boy. I gave the license plate number to the cop who finally showed up long afterwards and will never know what happened.
I think there are people who make reports to the proper authorities but they never know if there was an investigation and don't see anything change so become frustrated by the legal system.

[laurenE]

Hidden one,

I am so sorry you had to endure such suffering.  I can relate to you in many many ways.     I wonder what the gym teacher wuold say now if she knew.   I wonder what my aunt would say if she really knew why I cried at the Dr office (my mom used to threaten to let him hurt me in any way he wanted .  I believed her bc she was phys and sexually abusing me and my father was a dangerous alcoholic. ).   

I just dont understand why we had to put up with so much.   But we did and we have survived.   Thats the important thing.


Autum,

You are so right.  Thank you for your input.   Child abuse is a crime and needs to be reported, no matter what the cost.